Abigail Breslin Has A 25-Year-Old Boyfriend, Commence Your ‘Ahhh I’m Old Freakout’ Now

Abigail Breslin Enders Game Red carpet 2013

(Photo: FayesVision/WENN.com)

As much as I hate to come in like a wrecking ball, I do have to inform you that you are old. You know how I know you’re old. Because when someone says “Abigail Breslin” to you, you picture her in Raising Helen:

raising helen its not going to be okay


Or Little Miss Sunshine:

Abigail Breslin Little Miss Sunshine


You do not picture her making out with a 25-year-old man who she refers to as her “boyfriend.” But alas, that’s what’s happening with her now. The Ender’s Game star’s currently dating Jack Barakat from the band, All Time Low. And yes, I also just heard about All Time Low today. Mere moments ago, I thought “all time low” simply referenced how you felt after soberly binge-eating an entire block of cheese.

“I’m at an all time low,” I texted my friend on Saturday morning after realizing that what started as a quick slice of cheese had turned into several slices of cheese.

While we don’t know much else about Jack Barakat, we do know that he’s robbing us of our youth by dating Abigail Breslin. If everything had gone according to plan, she’d have remained young forever and for always. It’s bad enough that Dakota Fanning had to go and grow up. Do we have to lose Abigail too? Can’t some child stars just stay child stars? If not for the career opportunities that it would provide them, then for the solace it would provide us?

Ugh, the passage of time, when you think about it, it’s really just so ridiculous.

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    • Rachel

      Crazy that all time low is still making music but thy have such a scary, faithful fanbase so I guess not. I remember several yrs back when my friend met them and came back pissed saying how much of a douche jack was lol I know she seems very mature but I just dont understand dating a teen when you’re past the age of 20 : maybe 19 but even then…

      • Jess

        I smell lies, or perhaps a bad day.
        I’ve met Jack Barakat 3 times, each at his concert, and he was the nicest person i’ve ever met.
        He signed some stuff for me and called me a sweetheart.
        A girl had an anxiety attack at the concert and Jack helped her and told her to wipe her tears away and he preaches loving your body no matter what size.

        I feel like he’s a great man and not a ‘douche’
        We are definitely a faithful fanbase but not delusional.

        I believe if they ARE dating (even though they’ve never said it) she is a little too young.

      • Rachel

        Im just simply stating what i’ve been told. Mentioned to my friend that I wouldnt mind going to one of their shows and he said he, and a few other people I also know, went to their show, got to meet the whole band afterwards and said Jack was a total douche to them so they just ended up leaving. Very possible he was just in a pissy mood. Never said you guys were a delusional fan base, but bands are people too and even with my favorite artists I dont assume who’s nice and who’s not because if you’ve never actually spent a large amount of time with a person, you cant really know how they are.

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