Happy 18th birthday to Kendall Jenner! We know she’s 18 because TMZ made sure to start that super helpful and also super appropriate countdown to her birthday last month, just like today they made sure to post an article with the headline, “Kendall Jenner — I Can Do Porn.” As expected, Kendall’s birthday prompted plenty of sweet tweets from her fans wishing her an absolutely splendid day. It also prompted plenty of people to express their excitement over the fact that it’s now legal for them to have sex with her. These tweets ranged from “wink wink, nudge nudge” style references to her sister Kim Kardashian’s sex tape to very candid confessions about wanting to partake in all the sex with her. I combed through a lot of these tweets and chose a few of the perviest in the bunch for your reading pleasure and/or horror. Enjoy.
Happy It’s Ok to follow Kendall Jenner day!
— Matthew (@elemint) November 3, 2013
That’s right, everybody. After years of stalking her Twitter feed every hour on the hour, it’s finally okay to click that follow button. What resilience.
Similar sentiment here. As this guy explains, it’s still creepy, just not as creepy.
This single tweet accounts for a few thousand pervs based on all the retweets it got.
YOURE LEGAL @KendallJenner LEMME LOVE YOU DOWN
— Pierré (@Primetime_Prim) November 3, 2013
Yes, I’m sure her first order of business as an 18-year-old will be to hook up with a stranger propositioning her through social media.
I WOULD ENJOY LEGALLY ENGAGING IN INTERCOURSE WITH THE NOW LEGAL KENDALL JENNER. THAT IS ALL
— josé (@jvsxm) November 3, 2013
THANK YOU FOR SHARING THAT INFORMATION WITH US EVEN THOUGH IT WAS TOTALLY UNNECESSARY. THAT IS ALL.
Finally someone puts it in terms we can all understand.
I like to think this guy is just sitting around his house waiting for Kendall to show up.
Today every mans dream came true. @KendallJenner is legal. Happy 18th Kendall.
— Tyler Walker (@tdTWALK12) November 3, 2013
Wow. Dream big, buddy.
I got a feeling now that since she is 18 years old Kendall Jenner is going to do porn
— Shabazz Fisher (@gfisher12) November 3, 2013
Thanks for sharing your very creative and original thought.
tomorrow should be a holiday since @KendallJenner turns 18 today
— Ryan Mulloy (@RyanMulloy7) November 3, 2013
Why? What would you do with the time off? Never mind, I don’t want to know.
So Kendall Jenner you’ve been 18 for almost 9 hours now, why haven’t the “leaked” nudies come out yet?
— Jethro Dawkins (@What_IsThaDeal) November 3, 2013
Yeah Kendall, WHAT’S TAKING YOU SO LONG?!