As you probably noticed from being a social person who gets invited places and/or from being a Facebook stalker, Halloween 2K13 kicked off this past weekend. And I say kicked off, because it’s still going. In fact, legally speaking, we’re a full day away from the actual holiday. Which means that there’s still a chance that you need a great costume idea. Luckily for you, we have approximately one billion of them. Group ideas! Couple ideas! Best friend ideas! Cheap ideas! Even ideas for people who hate Halloween! And, as a lovely bonus, we’ve put together a list of ideas of costumes that you should absolutely not wear.
I know, I know, I can hear you whispering Halloween Grinch under your breath. But hear me out. There are tons of awesome and amazing Halloween costumes out there. And there are just as many terrible ones. In fact, based on my newsfeed, the terrible might outweigh the great. So before you make a Halloween decision that you will regret for the rest of your life, take a quick look at this list and make sure that you weren’t planning to do any of the following.
1. Anything that involves blackface
(Photo: Devone Byrd/Pacific Coast News)
Unless you’re openly racist and into sharing that fact with the world, there’s not one valid reason for you to do blackface this Halloween. Not one. And no, before you ask, darkening your skin isn’t the same as White Chicks. Sorry. That’s just a fact. Also have some respect for yourself and try to stop bringing up the fact that you’ve seen White Chicks. It’s bad enough that you’re racist, do you want to be known for having horrible taste in movies too?
2. Any Version of Miley Cyrus
(Photo: Andres Otero/WENN)
Ugh. As if we didn’t already see enough of these running around during Halloween: Part One. I know, I hear you, you’ve practiced your sultry tongue pose for weeks, but so has everyone else who wants an excuse to get naked and swing around on a wrecking ball all night. How about someone less popular, like Dana Brody or Anne of Green Gables.
3. Breaking Bad Characters
Refer to number two please. And keep in mind that unless you’re actually cooking meth at the party, you won’t be the best “Breaking Bad” people there.
4. Anything Political
Look, I know you looooovvveee being politically savvy, but Halloween isn’t the time to get into it. Why? Because the last thing people want to think about when they’re dressed up like sexy idiots is what’s going on in the world. And even though you promised not to bring up Obamacare at the party, you definitely will after a few drinks. Then everyone will hate you and make you go home and you’ll be remembered as that buzzkill who ruined the whole night with statistics about sick people.
5. Amanda Bynes
This costume would be totally hilarious if she wasn’t suffering from an extremely serious mental illness. Please, have some class.
6. Paula Deen
(Photo: Joel Ginsburg/WENN)
So here’s the problem with dressing up as someone racist. You sometimes get so into character that you end up being racist. And since I know you’re not racist, I would hate to see you being that person at the party. Especially since Julianne Hough and Ireland Baldwin helped us reach our racist costume quota much earlier than expected this year.