There are a lot of celebrities on Twitter right now, which I know because they have the verified blue check and I don’t. And, for the most part, it’s pretty standard stuff. You know, shameless promotion of their new projects, selfies, and lots of pet pictures. But then, every so often, you come across a celebrity’s Twitter who you really didn’t expect to see there. It’s like running into your ex-BFF at a carnival when you’re both with your new BFFs… except you never actually knew the celebs. Which is why it surprises you that they tweet, in the first place! See where I’m going with this?
These 8 celebrities being Twitter-ers (sorry, all of my old English teachers; I didn’t even try with that one) confuses me a lot because them being there just feels so out of place.
1. Katie Holmes
Katie is the newest celebrity to have joined Twitter and I tried really hard to think of what she could possibly tweet that would be even a tiny bit interesting, but I can’t so I’m going to declare that there won’t be anything.
2. Kendall Jenner
At first, it seems like this one wouldn’t surprise you so much, considering the fact that she is the spawn of noted fame cyborg, Kris Jenner. But Kendall is actually very vocal about wanting privacy and wishing everyone would mind their beeswax, so the fact that she tweets 500 times a day seems counterintuitive, no?
3. Kevin Spacey
If you told me to name the most serious actor that I could think of, Kevin Spacey would be in the top 5. He’s so intimidating that I actually have to refer to him by first and last name or else I feel like I’m committing some crime. I battled with whether or not I should call him Sir Spacey, but I figured the alliteration would be too loopy-sounding for such an astute fella like himself.
4. Mark Wahlberg
Mark seems like he has no interest in the world other than spending 24 hours of his day going grocery shopping with his kids and making tie-dye shirts with them. There’s no time for tweeting when you’ve got pastel-colored garments to DIY!
It’s difficult for me to believe she’s a real person who would say LOL use hashtags, so I just felt like Twitter wasn’t in her life plan. But hashtag here she is.
6. Lenny Kravitz
If you don’t think that Lenny is way too cool for school, then you’ve got something wrong, mister. In my mind, he only uses Twitter to laugh at everyone on his timeline every Throwback Thursday because they all looked like such losers and he never went through an awkward phase. I’m almost positive of this.
7. Martha Stewart
Martha Stewart is the mom who screams urgently, making you race to her, stubbing your toe and collapsing a lung in the process, only to ask you to search something for her on the world wide web via Ask Jeeves. What I’m saying is that she seems totally out of it and totally into the cinnamon-chocolate chip biscuits in the oven.
UM, where do I even began with this guy?! First of all, his Twitter icon is of a Prince impersonator and his header is of Dave Chapelle, also dressed as him. It’s safe to say that he’s the most enigmatic person to ever become a celebrity, and yet, here he is, using Twitter like a completely normal person. My brain’s imploding.