Halloween is just around the corner, and if you guys are anything like me, there’s a chance that you don’t have your costume picked out, yet. And when I say ‘a chance’, what I really mean is…you don’t have your costume picked out yet, do you? DO YOU. You can’t lie to me.
I know I don’t, anyway, so I turned to the same source that I always turn to for help in trying times — celebrities. I decided to look through some celebrity outfits from past years and see if their ideas could work for me. If I happened to find, like, a million dollars lying on the ground and decided to spend it on a really bangin’ costume.
But in case you’re more creative and inventive than I am, here are what I’ve scientifically determined to be the best celebrity Halloween costumes of all time. Use them wisely.
1. Miley Cyrus as Nicki Minaj
I don’t always love Miley Cyrus, but I have to give her serious props for her Nicki Minaj costume. It’s perfect and she didn’t even go the Saturday Night Live route and do black face. I wish I wasn’t so impressed by that in 2013.
2. Heidi Klum as Cleopatra
Even though her party had to be rescheduled last year because of Hurricane Sandy, Heidi still came through with another amazing costume, true to form. This time she bedazzled her face, which is like…so original and probably the coolest thing I’ve ever heard of.
3. Katy Perry as Jane from Daria
I love a group costume, ladies, and I’m also a sucker for real humans dressing up as cartoons. You get serious props for this this throwback, Katy.
4. Kate Moss as Morticia Addams
Probably the one day a year when people didn’t get on her for being too skinny.
5. Neil Patrick Harris and family as characters from The Wizard Of Oz
(Photo: Twitter via Crushable)
Ouch. My ovaries. Gideon and Harper, could you pick those up for me?
6. Katy Perry as Freddie Mercury
Katy Perry, welcome back to the list. Normally I wouldn’t have let anyone be on here more than once, but you hit another one of my sweet spots by dressing up like a dude, facial hair and all. Gets me every time.
7. Kim Kardashian as Poison Ivy
I think I can definitely quit drinking the Kim haterade for long enough to sputter out my approval of this costume. You crushed it, girl.
8. Rose McGowan as Cyrano de Bergerac
MORE FACIAL HAIR ON LADIES. I approve of it so strongly that it wins out over my general distate for unnecessary Halloween cleavage. Also props for a literary reference. I’m too easy.
9. Michelle Trachtenberg as Tim Burton’s Blue Girl
(Photo: Jemal Countess/Getty Images)
10. Fergie as Honey Boo Boo
(Photo: Jemal Countess/Getty Images Entertainment)
This was super topical at the time, and Fergie always has really incredible costumes, so you need to pull it together and start getting inspired by her. And Josh Duhamel too, because their buddy costumes are amazing.
11. Jessica Alba as Dora the Explorer
And yet another of my guilty pleasures — hot girls going as non-hot things for Halloween. Jessica’s also a mom to her two girls Honor and Haven, so this suits her way better than, say, a slutty cop.
12. Kate Upton as bionic Marilyn Monroe
I’m so grateful to you for going as someone other than regular Marilyn Monroe that I’m putting you right on the list.
13. Matthew Morrison as Richard Simmons
If Matthew Morrison didn’t smirk so damn much, this costume is so awesome that it makes me feel like I could actually like the guy.
14. Miranda Kerr as a ringleader
(Photo: Rob Kim/Getty Images Entertainment)
If you really must go in a sexy costume, find a way to make it work. Oh and also have the body of a Victoria’s Secret angel, if you can. That always helps.
15. Scott Disick as Patrick Bateman
Scott just earned so much of my grudging respect for having the self-awareness to know that he is EXACTLY like the main character in American Psycho.
16. JWoww as a nerd
Mostly I like this one just because I think she looks way cuter in this jokey costume than she ever has in her Jersey Shore clothes. For reals.
17. Chord Overstreet as Brad Pitt
I know it’s blurry, but look up other pictures from that night. The resemblance is pretty uncanny.
18. Ellen DeGeneres as Sofia Vergara
And finally, Ellen. I love celebrities dressing up as each other, and I love Ellen, so you had to know this one was gonna be on the list. Obsessed.