• Tue, Oct 15 - 11:10 am ET

Robert Pattinson May Sign Onto Fifty Shades Because He Needs A New Crappy Franchise

I feel like casting stuff with Fifty Shades Of Grey has gotten so bad at this point that we’ve entered some sort of a time loop and are going through the same occurrences over again. Otherwise, how could it possibly be that we are considering Robert Pattinson for the role of Christian Grey? …again.

He was one of the rumored contenders in the beginning, back when the book was a more recent memory and people like Matt Bomer were still in contention. But then the movie got cast with a coupla relative unknownsDakota Johnson and Charlie Hunnam — and I assumed that was the end of it. Too bad so sad for you, R-Pattz. Go cry in your vampire sparkles.

But then one of the unknowns up and changed his mind about being associated with this (maybe) crap-fest, and off went Charlie in a puff of smoke and palpable relief. And I, devastated, did what any fervent fangirl would do; I put together a list of all the guys in Hollywood with so little to lose that they might sign onto the project. You know who wasn’t on there, though? Rob Pattinson. Because I didn’t think he’d do it. I didn’t even know if Dakota would get to be in the movie, frankly, because I know that she and Charlie were cast together. (And totally not by process of elimination at all.)

You never know who will stay in a movie if one costar goes, and from the sound of it, Dakota was panicking a little, wondering if she’d be offloaded. But apparently she shouldn’t be stressing, at least according to a source speaking to Hollywood Life:

“Dakota earned the role and she shouldn’t be worried right now. The only time she will have to worry, if at all, is if they hire someone that has no chemistry with her. But they are casting the actor with her in mind.”

The same source also says that they’ll likely replace Charlie with a newbie to the scene versus an established star, mostly because an established star wouldn’t take the role. But apparently E.L. James is feeling a renewed sense of hopefulness about casting her first choice, Ye Olde R-Pattz.

“It’s his role if he wants it.”

WANT IT, ROBERT. WANT IT. I know you’ve been aching for rude things to say about a new franchise ever since you finished up with Twilight.

(Image: LJT Images / WENN.com)

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  • Mee

    You know you’re an idiot right? Rob neither needs or wants this role, but I guess you need him for hits? I’m right aren’t I? Put your tallens away and get a new job. You aren’t good at this one js – lame ass site is lame. Leave Rob out of your silly asinine articles, if you can call them that.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      My talons or my talents?
      And yes, I can call them articles. Because that’s what they are.

    • Meredith Hirt

      I’m glad that person clarified a “lame ass site is lame.” I thought calling something “lame ass” meant it was cool!

  • NeuroNerd

    Did you know that Dakota Johnson is the daughter of Don Johnson and Melanie Griffith, the step-daughter of Antonio Banderas, and the grand-daughter of Tippi Hedren? Does Hollywood know that? I’m shocked her family couldn’t pull strings and get her a better “break through” role, especially after the debacle that was “Ben and Kate.”

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      I did know that! And I’m also shocked they couldn’t give her a better boost.

  • pushkin

    Sorry, but why shouldn’t Rob Pattinson dis Twilight? What self-respecting dude wouldn’t? The first one was kind of stylized and cool, but the rest? Gah! Good on him for trying to distance himself from that drech (sorry, that’s German grandmother-speak for crappola).

  • Get it right

    This is pathetic. Quoting HL? What a joke. Too bad you didn’t quote VARIETY. They ran the real story about how Rob turned down the role the first time it was offered. He wants nothing to do with this dreck and even refused to meet with EL James when she crashed his house party.

    She snuck in as Heather Graham’s plus one, but as soon as he heard of her arrival, he made himself scarce. She admitted to PEOPLE that she never even got to meet him. He never wants to see her creepy, stalker face.