• Thu, Oct 10 - 3:30 pm ET

Owen Wilson Rips A Page From Simon Cowell’s Book, Impregnates Married Lady

owen wilson midnight in paris surprise face

There must be something in the water out there in Hollywood because Owen Wilson just got a married lady named Caroline Lindqvist pregnant. And before you say that married people are allowed to get pregnant whenever they want, let me clarify here — she’s not married to Owen Wilson. She’s married to some other guy who she’s currently in the process of divorcing. I know, I know. This feels like deju vu. But it’s not. You’re just thinking of the time that Simon Cowell got his good friend’s wife pregnant.

If this was a rom-com, her husband would played by Luke Wilson, Caroline would be played by Kate Hudson and the inept OB-GYN would be played by Vince Vaughn. Hijinks, hilarity and paternity tests would ensue. While I don’t want to commit to a title too soon, I do think that it would be called something like Two Brothers, One Uterus or Duderus Get Out of My Wife’s Uterus.

Unfortunately for my screenwriting career, this is not a rom-com and it is real life. This will be Owen Wilson’s second child, which is a fun fact that I totally forgot about. That child’s mother is someone named Jade Duell. A name that I can honestly say rings approximately no bells in my head. But neither did the child’s name, Robert. To be completely honest with you right now, I’m kinda doubting my job. These are all things that I should know. But here I am, unable to even tell you when little Robert was born. By the time this babe pops out I’ll probably forgot the name Caroline Lindqvist too. Such is life.

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    Maybe in 20 years Baby Cowell and Baby Wilson can meet up and bond over this.

    • Jenni

      I smell a really good reality show

  • Rachel Sea

    She was already getting divorced, that’s practically single.