In her new book Melissa Explains It All: Remember Me? I Was Big in the ’90s But I Still Do Stuff Now. Please Remember Me!, TV legend Melissa Joan Hart tells a story about the time she and Ryan Reynolds made out back when they starred together in the Sabrina the Teenage Witch movie. You might remember this story from the time Melissa told it on Chelsea Lately. It seemed desperate then and it seems desperate now when I read another quote from her about it, this time detailing how she told Ryan’s golden-haired, possibly pregnant but maybe just bloated wife Blake Lively the magical story.
Apparently Blake reached out to Melissa for help with Ryan’s birthday present last year because I’m guessing Blake took a peek at Ryan’s phone to see who he was friends with and assumed all the incoming calls from Melissa meant they were BFF. Allegedly. In my vivid imagination. That’s when Melissa decided she just couldn’t keep her make-out sesh with RyRey a secret anymore, because she assumed Blake would buy a copy of her book and respond like Bryce Dallas Howard in The Help. Here’s what Melissa told Life & Style about the encounter.
“It’s funny. I told her, ‘Just so you know, I’m coming out with a book,’ and she was like, ‘Okay!’”
I like to imagine that “okay” was followed by a nervous laugh as Blake flipped her golden tresses over her shoulder, causing five people nearby to run into walls from distraction, before she frantically texted “HELP ME” to Ryan’s phone.
Melissa also explained (explained…get it?) to Life & Style that she and Blake are “friendly with each other.” As friendly as a woman can be with the woman who talks about making out with her husband every chance she gets and describes it in her book with the following words (I’m not making this up):
“I remember that his lips were pretty wonderful, plus he has these big hands and shoulders that completely swallowed my petite frame,” she recalls. “It was a terrific distraction from how strongly he smelled of hair product.”
Melissa could start a class at the Learning Annex where she teaches stars how to save up their juicy celebrity encounters in their mental piggy banks and then cash in on the investment when the hourglass that keeps track of their fifteen minutes is down to its last few grains of sand. Melissa explains it all, indeed.
(Photo: Andres Otero/WENN.com)