• Mon, Sep 9 - 4:18 pm ET

Wentworth Miller Reveals That He Attempted Suicide Before Coming Out

Wentworth Miller attending Fox TCA Summer Party July 2007I really have to hand it to Wentworth Miller. In an industry where many stars feel compelled to hide their sexual orientation for their entire lives, making PR stunts out of their relationships and forever denying the persistent rumors and blind items, he summoned the bravery to come out as a homosexual.

Some people might be inclined to judge him for the fact that he denied it for such a long time before truly revealing himself, but I honestly think that only made it more difficult. The longer you tell a lie, the harder it becomes to ultimately reveal the truth, and the fact that he was able to speaks volumes.

I also love the way that he came out — not with any fanfare, like it’s something to be ashamed of, but presenting it as a simple fact and the reason he wasn’t comfortable traveling to Russia. But not only was he able and willing to express his true self, he’s also revealed more about his history, bravely admitting that he attempted suicide ‘more than once’ before he was really able to come to terms with who he was:

“The first time I tried to kill myself I was 15. I waited until my family went away for the [weekend] and I was alone in the house and I swallowed a bottle of pills. I don’t remember what happened over the next couple of days but I’m pretty sure come Monday morning I was on the bus back to school pretending everything was fine.”

See, this is the most heartbreaking thing for me. As a teen, the support of your family is so important, and if he didn’t have that, I can’t imagine how difficult it was for Wentworth to struggle with himself and his self-worth.

“Growing up I was a target. Speaking the right way, standing the right way, holding your wrist the right way. Every day was a test and there was a thousand ways to fail. A thousand ways to portray yourself to not live up to someone else’s standards of what was accepted.”

It’s a pretty tragic explanation of how he got to be such a good actor on Prison Break though — from teaching himself to lie by careful observation of others. Makes my heart heavy.

“I had multiple opportunities to speak my truth, which is that I was gay, but I chose not to. I was out privately to family and friends — publicly, I was not. I chose to lie — when I thought about the possibility of coming out, how that might impact me and the career I worked so hard for, I was filled with fear.”

It’s hard to hear about Wentworth — or anyone — operating from a place of fear, but it makes me feel so much better to see him confronting it now and really opening up about his struggles. Good for you, buddy. So glad you’re taking control of your life and trying to help others going through the same things you went through. Super brave.

(Image: Roger Eldemire / WENN.com)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    I have so much respect for him.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      I can’t even imagine how tough it must’ve been.