Let’s Pool Our Money To Buy Taylor Swift A Friend Over The Age Of Sixteen

Hailee Steinfeld and Taylor Swift Summer 2013 Twitter pictureI’ll acknowledge that I may be biased against Taylor Swift, but is it so much to ask that she finds some friends her own age? I have a whole menagerie of issues with this girl, mostly centering around her ongoing plot to become the Pinterest version of herself and move into a repurposed antique store with her cat, Meredith, but aside from that, I would just really like to see Taylor hang out with someone over the age of nineteen.

She was photographed going shopping in West Hollywood yesterday, ‘joined by her good friend Hailee Steinfeld. (Who I’m hoping, by the way, is a slightly better good friend than her good friend Dianna Agron). Hailee seems cool, and I think we’d all enjoy some fun shoptimes with her, until you remember that she’s sixteen years old. And Taylor is twenty-three. That’s a seven year difference at an age where you can really tell, so what’s the deal, Tay?

Do you really like shopping at Limited Too? Is that it? Or trash-talking One Direction with someone who’s still young enough to be into them? Or is it just that younger ladies and people you employ at your concerts are more likely to go along with your themed outfit requirements? WHICH IS A REAL THEORY THAT I HAVE. Hear me out.

You guys, I seriously think that Taylor or someone on her team calls ahead and dictates the fashion for the day. I’m not kidding. We don’t have access to the photos, because this is a cruel world, but she and Hailee are wandering West Hollywood both wearing tattered, antique-y looking dresses in muted colors. And Taylor has a floppy hat and a piece of statement jewelry because one must never be caught off-guard when there could be photographers around.

But earlier this year, when they hung out on Memorial Day, they were match-y match-y then, too, but in a different way, in shorts and sweaters over button-downs. And the theme seemed to be red, white, and blue. I’M ONTO SOMETHING, HERE. There’s no way this happens naturally, and people over a certain age like Selena Gomez aren’t gonna agree to it, so you gotta go younger, all the way down to sixteen sometimes. I get it.

You can tell me this isn’t true all you want, but then I’ll just be like — sorry about my arm.

(Image: WENN.com)

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    • Apricot Jam

      Huh? You know she’s friends with Selena Gomez (21) and Dianna Agron (28). You’ve already written bitchy articles about it. Oh, I see, this is another thing you’re going to pretend is an issue, so you can use it to attack Taylor. Carry on.

    • avalon

      Biased against Taylor? You need to seek psychiatric help for your obsession with her! The other day you decided her 27 yo friend Diana Agron is basically sick of Taylor because of a 2 second video of her.You think something is wrong with Taylor because she went shopping with a friend who is 16 but you also have problems when she hangs out with her mostly 20 something friends. Whats really funny is how you make comments about her clothes. Because no matter what you think about her style of dress the outfit she has on that you are making fun of will be sold out from every store that ever had it in stock..Alexis you are the one who sounds like a jealous 16yo after reading this stupid story. Now I will wait for your oh so clever snarky remarks.

    • Rachel

      I think it’s because, mentally, she is a 16-year-old girl. But she’s also an 80-year-old woman. I don’t know. TSwift is a conundrum.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        She’s walking a thin, weird line.

    • Amy

      Why does it matter how old her friends are? Who cares! But for those who do care, Taylor was just with Sarah Hyland, who is 22, the day before at a FUN concert. I hate it how people just find stupid and silly things to hate Taylor for because she is an all-around wonderful person who doesn’t do anything bad, so therefore they do not have anything bad to write about her! One day everyone will see why Taylor is an amazing person and an excellent role model for everyone. <3

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I can’t wait for that day! Snarking is exhausting!

    • mse63

      This has nothing to do with Taylor but I’m 23 and I’d totally hang out with Hailee Steinfeld any day, just sayin’.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        That’s fair. She does seem like a pretty cool girl.

    • Sarah

      It’s not really the norm to be 23 hanging out with a 16 year old. Is that what age you girls hung out with at 23?

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        No indeed.

      • Amy

        Why does it matter what age your friends are? I don’t see a problem! It is like an older sister hanging out with their younger sister. And all they were doing was shopping.

      • FauxRealFaux

        What adult wants to befriend a 16 year old? Like omigawd, that’s totally, like really odd!

    • Meredith Hirt

      Is TSwift’s cat really named Meredith? Well, there’s another thing to add to the list of reasons why I can’t stand her.

    • FauxRealFaux

      Taylor Swift reminds of that movie “Single. White. Female” for some reason….

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    • UU

      Wow, people are so uptight. When I was sixteen, I only wanted older friends. One of my closest friend was 13 years older than me. And no, we didn’t talk about boy bands..