One of the beautiful things about social media is that it gives you the ability to convince anyone you feel needs convincing that your life is nothing but butterflies, rainbows and tropical vacations. Which is exactly the route Robin Thicke took amidst the gossip and scandal that grabbing the ass of a teenage socialite will cause when you’re one of the year’s most popular singers.
But look, everyone, it’s okay because the Thicke/Patton union is still a blissfully happy one! Because he tweeted a picture to show us that they’re not sweating the happy hands ass-grab – they’re on a boat! Somewhere warm and pretty! With their insanely adorable son! And far, far away from drunken messes who don’t wear real underwear under miniskirts.
Family vaca! pic.twitter.com/dUnLiJfRPx
— Robin Thicke (@robinthicke) August 30, 2013
In case you’re wondering, E! did a background check on the bare-assed blonde chick, and it turns out she’s an incoming freshman (yeah, let that sink in) who’s also a super rich socialite who likes to snap pics of her in a bikini on her dad’s yacht or something. So I’m sorry to say, Perez Hilton and company, that the scandalous photo in question was not in fact photo shopped, according to
blonde chick Lara Scolaro. It was sloppy and intentional and everything she wanted it to be. I bet her rich daddy feels the same way.
But seriously, I hope we can all move past this. By far the most scandalous thing that happened at anything associated with the VMAs was the hyper-sexualized appearance of
Miley Cyrus Angelica Pickles’ doll, Cynthia.