I have some excellent news for those five of you who aren’t over all the musical group reunions that have been taking place at a near constant rate since the early 2000s — ‘NSync is getting back together for one magical evening to perform at this year’s Video Music Awards, airing on Sunday in all their glory. Aren’t you so excited? Aren’t you just so tickled you could spit? When when WHEN was the last time that a band from our childhoods got back together for one special night while thirty-somethings hopped around in ill-advised crop tops? Oh that’s right, every time.
The Spice Girls got back together for the London Olympics last year, Destiny’s Child briefly came out to join Beyonce for the Super Bowl, New Kids On The Block reunited in 2007 and have been touring together ever since, 98 Degrees did a one-time show in 2012, and god knows that The Backstreet Boys somehow never went away and continue to pump their music into the ether via their new album ‘In A World Like This’, released this year, their twentieth anniversary. Sorry, did you catch that? I’ll say it again — THEIR TWENTIETH ANNIVERSARY.
So now ‘NSync is joining the party, too, after being on a ‘hiatus’ since 2002. And here’s the thing…I know I should be excited, but doesn’t everybody remember that we already got the best part out of this band? Justin Timberlake is our precious little musical diamond, so why must we put him back on the boy band necklace from whence he came? He sparkleth just as mightily on his own as in a group, doth he not? And might not his fellow sapphires feel tarnished at having to share the same jewelry with him after not being admired for years upon years? Also..what is the meaning of my metaphor? I think I’ve lost control of it.
So I mean feel free to get pumped or whatever, but bear in mind that this means you have to reacquaint yourself on rest of these guys so you remember what they look like, and they don’t appear as just a seething mass of leather pants and open shirts on the stage tomorrow. I’m assuming we’re sticking with late ’90s costuming, yes? With all that said, I’m gonna wrap this up now, because you’re probably gonna need the rest of this week to get yourselves updated on what Lance Bass, Joey Fatone, J.C. Chasez, and Chris Kirkpatrick are up to. YEAH. CHRIS KIRKPATRICK. That’s still a thing. Have funnnn!