I have the best story for you right now, you guys. It’s straight off the Bizarro World presses, and I can only hope you’ll enjoy it as much as I do: Kim Kardashian and Katie Couric have just become embroiled in a feud. A feud, I tell you! I had no idea these two ladies even knew each other but they. are. feuding.
Okay so. I’m gonna take you through a step-by-step process of how this all went down. Please step with me into Bizarro World, the land of the bendy mirrors and constant surprises. In this world, Katie Couric sent Kim and Kanye West a gift for baby North West shortly after she was born, because I guess that’s something that
celebrities celebrities’ personal assistants do for each other. That was the first step down the road that leads to this beef.
For the second step we have to briefly jaunt out of Bizarro World, back into the real world, where people have predictable, logical opinions about the things they see around them. In this world, Katie did an interview with In Touch in which she said she didn’t quite understand why Kim and the rest of the Kardashian family was famous. In her own words, “I think it’s mostly teenage girls that are interested.” Yeah, I tend to agree. Nothing too crazy there, just a personal opinion, marveling at something she doesn’t understand. Nothing rude there, right?
Then back to Bizarro World! In this world, Kim Kardashian is intelligent enough to care what Katie Couric thinks, but not quiiiiite intelligent enough to avoid creating a controversy by responding to the (very minor) diss. Also in this world, it’s important to note that Instagram is the best way to make public such a response. So. Kim posted a picture of the gift and card she received from Katie, and…I don’t even know where to start with how amazing it is.
Where to begin. First of all, let’s talk about the hashtags, because I think our friend Kim might have misunderstood them. #MayIHumblySuggestYouNotSendGiftsThenTalkShit does not a hashtag make! You’re confused. No one is searching for that. But on the bright side, you just gave my
coworker FRIEND SHE IS MY FRIEND Meg the idea for her next birthday party theme.
Secondly, let’s discuss the note itself, which I have to assume is missing some crucial letters and/or words at the end of those sentences. (Either that or Katie Couric is finally admitting she’s an Animagus with the line ‘as the moth’.) And since I see a Barney’s imprint on that card, I’m kind of worried about what’s going on in their card-sending department. If you can’t get a celebrity-to-celebrity card accurate, then how can I trust you with my own missives to baby Nori?
And finally, does it seem to anybody else like TMZ might have a little beef of their own brewing with Katie Couric? I mean, just look at that headline — ‘Kim K to Katie Couric: You’re A Two-Faced Bitch’. Ummmm, no, TMZ. Never did she say that in her Instagram post. I know because I got very excited because that’s such a strongly-worded, specific insult to send someone’s way in 2013, and I was like, “Damn, Kimberly, you are really putting it out there.” But nope! Turns out it was just TMZ’s own personal assessment of the situation, which I find particularly hilarious, along with the rest of this feud. So great.
(Images: / WENN.com / Instagram)