I feel weirdly invested in the on-again-off-again-ness of Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez’s relationship, not only because I write about it, but also because I’m still trying to wrap my brain around how Selena could continue to reunite with such an irresponsible, diaper-panted douchebag. I’ve said before that I really like Selena Gomez despite her relationship with him, because she comes across as mature and grounded in an industry where the opposite is usually true among stars her age. So whenever I see her going on-again with Bieber, I wonder what such a mature young woman could see in such a reckless little brat.
According to TMZ, even Selena seems to think Justin is a douche. Sources say that she has only taken him back because over July Fourth he convinced her he could change. First of all, I’ll believe it when I see it. Second of all, I can’t imagine Justin saying anything to me that would make me want to get back together with him, not even “I brought you French fries.” But finally, even though TMZ points out that Justin’s recent horrible person streak has coincided with his separation from Selena, it shouldn’t be her responsibility to de-douche him. She’s not his mother or his sister or his teacher. She’s his girlfriend. Last I checked, babysitting, or rather Bieber-sitting, isn’t part of being a girlfriend, or at least it shouldn’t be. I think Selena can do so much better than this disrespectful, mop-bucket-peeing, monkey-abandoning, self-centered oversized baby. Plus, her recent possible use of Justin Bieber’s voicemail in her new song reeks of Taylor Swift’s influence, which makes me think she might be pretty impressionable herself. That doesn’t exactly guarantee she’ll be a good influence on the Biebs.
I’m starting to think Selena Gomez and Katy Perry need to team up and work together to raise their standards about men. Because Katy’s “don’t text other girls” and Selena’s “don’t be a douchebag” are simply not cutting it. Unless Selena is getting paid the big bucks to watch Justin while his mom’s out. In which case, I guess we can make an exception. No one wants to resort to mowing lawns in the summer.