Word just came in from Us Weekly that Henry Cavill and Kaley Cuoco are apparently dating. Which is fine by me. Sometimes I hear about a new celebrity couple and I go bananas. Just absolutely bananas. Step into my home after I receive the goods news and there’s a big chance you’ll slip on one of those peels faster than you can say, “hey it looks like Mario Kart up in here.” Then other times I hear about a new celebrity couple like Man of Steel’s Henry Cavill and every CBS award show’s Kaley Cuoco and I’m like oh, okay, that’s alright, sure, that’ll do, keep calm and carry on then.
I guess with these two, I just don’t have it in me to throw a party. Even a pity party that Henry’s off the market. But don’t let my rain cloud of blah dampen your moods. While the couple’s keeping quiet about their relash (pronounced re-laych) for now, Us Weekly points out that Kaley threw us all a bone last month with this tweet:
Everyone go see “man of steel”. It’s fantastic in every single way. pic.twitter.com/8MHv41zrQS
— Kaley Cuoco (@KaleyCuoco) June 15, 2013
Every. Single. Way.
Wow. That’s dripping with sexual innuendo. Either that or the middle school boy who currently resides inside of me is trying to get out again. If see me today, whisper basketBALLS in my ear. If I giggle and blush, it’s the middle school boy. If I stoically tell you I hate sports mentioned within my vicinity then the tweet is indeed dropping with some super strong sexual T. Which, on a related note, is name of the aphrodisiac ice tea line I tried to sell Snapple back in ’07.
While the new couple hasn’t officially stepped out yet — something that tabloids legally require to be considered legit — we’re assuming that it’s going to happen any day now. After all, their pal did tell Us Weekly that “they are totally hot for each other.” And that’s just not something that a pal spills lightly.