I bet you thought you could trust Jon Stewart, didn’t you? Sure, he left us for the summer in the (definitely British, probably capable) hands of John Oliver, but we have a history before that spanning almost a decade and a half. We had a life together, he and I and us, a life based on trust and respect and communication, and so we believed him when he said he needed to take a break from The Daily Show and we just assumed that meant all forms of the show. We’d been kind of pushy lately, and it’s perfectly natural for someone to need a break from a relationship as intimate as ours. It’s not that he’s running away, he’s just taking time for himself, right? Right? We would know if there was a third party involved, wouldn’t we? And besides, Jon would never do that. He respects the bond between us too much to throw it away on some new floozy. I’m sure he’s working on his directorial debut for Rosewater one hundred percent nonstop. I’m sure of it.
I thought we had something here. I thought we loved each other. And then you run off and get intimate with my Egyptian twin sister. I don’t know what to say. No but seriously guys, it’s a really cute interview, with Jon even memorizing some Arabic phrases for the beginning of the interview, then moving solidly into English by 2:30 in. If you can get past the devastating betrayal, I think you’ll really enjoy it.