Just when you thought that the Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart break-up would lead to you having sex with R.Pattz, a source says he’s not ready. As if you bought all that glitter and all those red cosmetic contact lenses just for fun. What’s the point of celebrating the break-up of a popular couple (“couple”) if there’s no chance you’ll ever sleep with him, accidentally get pregnant with his child and then spend the rest of your life being known as the lady Robert Pattinson knocked up? Riddle me that readers, riddle me that.
Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself here. I shouldn’t say there’s no chance that you can birth R.Pattz Jr. I’m just saying it might be awhile.
Although Rob is open to dating new women, a source tells HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY that he’s not looking to sleep around. “As for other girls, he isn’t sleeping with anyone yet, because he likes to have an emotional connection first,” the source reveals.
As someone who always prefers my bed over others, I totally get what’s he saying. Or what he’s telling a source who EXCLUSIVELY told Hollywoodlife.com what he’s saying. He’s not ruling out sleeping with someone, he’s just saying that he wants it to be on his terms. First of all, it’s going to go down in his bed. He spent a lot of money on it and he wants it go to good use. 100,000 thread count sheets don’t buy themselves. Second of all he wants an emotional connection. He wants to know things like your first name and the first initial of your last name and if you liked his performance in Water for Elephants and if you’re still upset about the season finale of Downton Abbey. And then, and only then, will he sleep with you. Not touch you. Just sleep. He has a very large bed, so it won’t be hard to do that. Once you’ve proven yourself to be a good sleeper, he may lean in for a kiss. But the guy just got out of a long relationship (“relationship”) so don’t push it by making the first move.
How do I know all this? Hollywoodlife.com isn’t the only site with exclusive sources. Ours just happens to be a co-worker I overheard in the bathroom who has no connection to anyone involved.
(Photo:David Tonnessen/Anthony Monterotti, PacificCoastNews.com)