So Turns Out If You Slap Beyonce’s Ass Mid-Concert, You Get To Leave Said Concert

Beyonce performing in Birmingham UK May 2013This may shock you, but it turns out if you slap Beyonce‘s ass during her concert, you’ll be politely asked to leave the venue. Like, immediately. It’s weird, I know — I have a working knowledge of what is and is not appropriate in a public setting, and my understanding was that it’s always okay to slap your hands around willy-nilly on peoples’ parts, provided that you have no possible chance of getting anywhere near them in any other setting. After all, what is a concert if not a private, one-on-one date between two interested parties who want to get to know each other better. By allowing you to buy a ticket to her concert, Beyonce was really implicitly saying, “Please join me as I dance and sing in front of you on a catwalk, and if you like what you see, feel free to put your hands on my body.” At least that’s what this dumb idiot thought, who was in the front row at her concert during ‘Irreplaceable’, and reached up to spank her as she was letting his friend sing ‘to the left, to the left’ into the mic.

Right around the :11 second mark, you can hear Beyonce tell the guy, post-slap, “I will have you escorted out of here. Alright?”, which is the nicest way I’ve ever seen someone respond to BEING SLAPPED ON THE RUMP DURING THEIR WORK HOURS. I gotta hand it to that guy, though — he really went all out on the romantic gestures. He had one move and he was going for it. Just sometimes people who are A. providing you a service, B. millionaires, and C. vastly more attractive than you aren’t super interested in having your plebe hands on their rumpus rooms. I don’t get it.

(Image: WENN.com)

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