Alright, before we get too judge-y on this new Britney Spears song that’s out, let’s take a moment to remind ourselves that it’s on the soundtrack for The Smurfs 2 and LOWER DEM EXPECTATIONS, SON. The song is called ‘Ooh La La’, and I am sad to report that it’s not the remake of Ashlee Simpson‘s song ‘La La’ that we’ve all been clamoring for ever since we heard the lyric, “You make me wanna / la la / in the kitchen on the floor / I’ll be your French maid / when you meet me at the door”. Genius. But no. Not a remake. Don’t worry, though — what this song lacks lyrically it makes up for with a one-note melody throughout almost the entire chorus. It’s easy for kids and smurfs and plants to learn, so you’ll never again have to strain your noodle trying to remember all the crazy different notes. Isn’t it nicer when they’re all the same one?
No but seriously, as boring as
some most parts of it are, this song really could be worse, so I don’t know what we’re all complaining about. Is it Britney’s triumphant return to music? Absolutely not? Will that moment ever come? I’m thinking probably not, particularly since Britney is about to begin a Las Vegas residency paying her $2 million a week. I doubt it’s at the tippy top of her list of priorities. I mean it could be worse though, guys. Bear in mind that we do still live in a world where the songs ‘E-Mail My Heart’ and ‘Touch Of My Hand’ exist. Choose your battles.
(Image: FayesVision / WENN.com)