• Mon, May 13 2013

Reasons Why Stephen Colbert Is the Greatest Human Being On The Planet

stephen colbert angry birds quote

Nation, today is that very special day when we celebrate the birth of the greatest human being on the planet, Stephen Colbert. Happy 49th birthday, Colbert, and thank you for all you do. Seriously, without The Colbert Report, twenty-somethings across the country would have absolutely no idea what was going on in the world. I know that I never would have passed my weekly current events quizzes in college without you.

But even if watching Colbert didn’t help you graduate from college, there are literally 9 trillion other reasons why you should worship this living legend every day, but especially today.

Nation, this is a man so generous that he donated over $300,000 to aid the relief efforts after Hurricane Sandy devastated the East Coast last October. He’s a man so patriotic that back in 2009, he traveled to Baghdad to film his shows in Iraq for a week to remind Americans about the soldiers still fighting overseas. He’s a man so ballsy that he testified on behalf of migrant workers on the floor of the United States Congress in total Colbert character. Oh, and he’s the funniest man on television.

In case you thought I was joking about the whole 9 trillion reasons thing, I hope you now understand that I was being completely serious. After careful consideration, I’ve decided not to list all 9 trillion of them. Just know that if I wanted to, I totally could.

Anyway, here are five videos/reasons why Stephen Colbert is so completely perfect and deserving of our adoration. Enjoy!

1. He introduced us to truthiness.

Not since Beyoncé gave us “bootylicious” has a pop culture figure had such an impact on my vocabulary as Colbert’s truthiness. Colbert refined this word as “not what is true, but rather what feels true,” in the very first episode of his show and set the tone for the greatness that has followed.

2. He helps you meet your representatives.

Going back to the whole, Colbert keeps twenty-somethings in the know thing, Colbert’s “Better Know A District” segment introduces his audience to their congressional representatives. And, you know, makes fun of those representatives, like he does in this video with Georgia representative Jack Kingston.

3. He loves the Olympics.

And I mean he really loves them. In fact, he was the sponsor for the US Olympic speed skating team back in 2010. But sponsorship wasn’t enough for this Olympic lover. He wanted to be in the games himself, so he decided to try out for the US curling team. Hilarity ensued.

4. He made this segment about Reince Priebus.

I can’t really think of way that this video contributes to society in any way, but I’m pretty sure my life is better for having seen it, and now yours can be better, too.

5. He’s multitalented.

More than just a funny guy, Colbert is also a talented musician. He’s sung frequently on his show, even holding his own with 5-time Tony winner Audra McDonald. And recently, Colbert used his vocal talents to collaborate Allen Cummings to create “Oopsie-Daisy Homophobe”, a spoof of Brad Paisley’s new song, “Accidental Racist.”

(Lead Image: Kill The Hydra)

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  • Jill O’Rourke

    I don’t use “truthiness” as much as I should.