Just when you thought signing up for that Match.com/VeryFamous account in Hollywood would lead you to meeting Jennifer Lawrence online, she gets spotted eating dinner with her ex-boyfriend Nicholas Hoult. And before you start thinking that this was some kind of innocent dining experience, E!’s insiders report that there was a whole lotta canoodling going on at their table. Which seems extra suspicious since “cuddling” and “speaking to the person you’re eating dinner with” were not listed as a side item on the menu. Not even on the specials of the day.
As always, we’re lucky enough to have an eyewitness source on the scene.
“…a source tells E! News that Jen and Nicholas were quite close at the restaurant last night, sitting next to each other for a couple of hours and cuddling at a table near the back of the restaurant. They seemed to be having “a nice time together,” one eyewitness said, but also “did seem to want their privacy while they were there.”
As much as I’m thrilled to hear that Jennifer Lawrence enjoyed her time out with her ex-boyfriend, I’m a little concerned that she seemed to want privacy. It’s as if she doesn’t know that privacy no longer exists for her. That went out the window when she accepted that Oscar earlier this year. From here on out her whole life will be told in a series of alleged statements from eyewitnesses. On one hand, it will make her unauthorized biography relatively easy to write. On the other hand, I’m going to make a lot of money writing it due to all the salacious stories about her on-set Silver Linings Playbook romance with Bradley Cooper that I plan to make up and put in. I’m sorry, I think those were both on the same hand. Maybe even the same finger.
The point is that she’s entered seriously-famous territory now and sources are going to start stalking her every move. So she better make up her mind as to whether she really wants to play these Jelena relationship games with Nicholas Hoult, because one more friendly meal and the paparazzi will be all over them for their rest of their lives. Then the next thing you know fame goes to her head and she’s walking around shirtless, giving away pet monkeys to random countries. Yes, it happens that fast.