Oh heavens no. What have we here? Our recently redeemed Kristen Stewart possibly getting into a car with Rupert Sanders just moments after her boyfriend Robert Pattinson leaves the city? Oh no, this won’t do. Not at all. Just when I thought we could put the horrors of last summer’s not-at-all-staged cheating scandal behind us, Kristen Stewart starts it all back up again by getting into a car with Rupert. Or a man who looks like Rupert in a dark, blurry photo.
But the fact that it may not be Rupert isn’t really here or there when we have a tragic love story to tell. If I’ve learned anything from reading The Daily Mail religiously is that it’s best enjoyed if you put facts and logic and sometimes even science aside. Don’t question anything. Just enjoy what they’re telling you. Even if what they’re telling you makes you say “huh” and “that’s not possible” and “I don’t think Kris Jenner has devil’s hooves in the place that normal feet go — and where did you find a doctor who said that it’s unlikely, but he’s seen stranger cases?”
Speaking of Kris Jenner, does anyone remember innocence? The dog days of summer? Those moments of pure bliss when you still believed that two teenagers could meet on the set of a movie, fall in love, share one oversized white undershirt and one backwards hat and live happily ever after? I do. It was last summer. My days and nights and yes, even my twilights were consumed with thoughts of Robsten. Then it all came crashing down when Kristen Stewart openly cheated on him with her Snow White and the Huntsman director in an affair that will go down in history as making little to no sense.
And now, thanks to these car photos, we’re back in that same exact place again. That place where we’re trying to figure out which way is up and which way is down and which way this PR stunt’s heading now. I used to think I had it all figured out. But now the only thing I know for sure is that Robsten is un-unbroken.