• Thu, Apr 18 2013

Kevin Jonas Channels His Inner Middle School Girl And Calls Selena Gomez Overrated

Kevin Jonas

I don’t know who hired the Jonas Brothers‘ babysitter, but she’s certainly not doing her job very well. In fact, it’s getting to the point with these boys that i’m starting to think they pulled a don’t-tell-mom-the-babysitters-dead on their parents, because truth be told, they’re kinda out of control right now. Nick Jonas is allegedly off having secret lunches with his ex-girlfriend Miley Cyrus, Joe Jonas is filming creepy video messages for high school girls and Kevin Jonas is secretly insulting Selena Gomez on what will go down in history as the Watch What Happens Live episode where something actually happened. At least in the tweenybopper world where twitter hashtags are about to duel it out in a way we’ve never seen before. We’re talking #JoBros, we’re talking #Selenators and we’re talking a bunch of confused parents who don’t understand why they’re daughters are falling apart emotionally. 

But before you pick your team, let me give you the rundown on what happened. Kevin Jonas, known in most circles as the dad of the group, went on Watch What Happens Live with Andy Cohen last night. While on the show, they played one of Andy’s favorite game called “Plead the Fifth.” Andy asks him who he thinks is the most overrated pop star out there right now. While he never names any names, he gets as close as you can without doing it. I would be remiss if my duties as an investigative journalist (who turned down no less than 6 jobs as at 20/20) if I didn’t point out that he used a classic middle school tactic here. Say everything without saying anything. That way when someone’s mom calls your mom saying you’re a bully, you can be like “Moooommm, I never said it was her who was wearing the see-through white pants, but if she was also wearing them on the day I discussed it as a general fashion taboo, I dunno, she should buy new pants.”

“Did you watch the MTV…no, no, I’m not going there…um, let’s see here, most overrated pop star…I think some people should stick to movies, some people should do music, so I’m going to just say there’s a group out there…man this is so hard because I feel like I’m going to get so much backlash…it’s not a group, it’s a person, I’m trying to be so nice and I can’t be so nice.”

He finally settles on Psy after debating whether or not he should reveal his real answer for an agonizing 1400 minutes. But I think we all know that’s not what he planned to say. No, I think by looking at what he said — MTV Movie Awards, movies, backlash — it’s pretty clear that he wanted to say Selena Gomez.  Which is amazing, because he’s Kevin Jonas. It’s not like he’s really in a good place to be insulting up-and-coming pop stars. After all, it’s not so long ago that he was one of them. A mediocre singer who got set up with with a great shtick (three moppet-haired brothers!) and an eager preteen fan base. So I’m not really sure if he’s the right guy to be pointing fingers at people who are attempting to start a singing career with limited talent. But I’m sure the Selenators will let him know that very fact in no time.

Good luck to him today, I think he’s going to need it. Other things he might need? Um a bodyguard, a new identity and a babysitter who actually make sure that he stays in bed at night after she tucks him in.

(GIF: Tumblr)

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  • Mia

    So according to you it’s not true that Selena Gomez should stick to movies? Smh! How much Hollywood records is paying you?

    • Jenni

      They pay me $5.99 with an additional $100 bonus for every comment I get.

    • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

      LOL!

    • Mia

      Glad you admitted it. Now if only selena gomex admitted that she’s an awful singer the world would be a little better.
      Kevin Jonas you have a new fan now!

    • http://www.facebook.com/dan.samels Dan Samels

      the world would be better if u killed yourself bitch

  • Rachel

    I’m gonna say it… I agree with him. Selena Gomez needs to leave the singing thing alone. Look, she seems like a very sweet, likeable girl, and I know we live in the whole “hey I did a few movies and some TV and I have a big, young fan base so I’ll give it a go” day n age, but I really think she should just let that go. Just because you can doesn’t mean you should : / P.S. It’s his thoughts on a question that was asked, just his opinion, not law and I doubt she really cares

    • DebMoore

      I hate that I know this, but this is at least her 3rd album (my daughter has her other 2) and she sings the theme songs on several Disney shows. I went to one of her concerts about 2 summers ago (with my daughter of course!) and she did a pretty good job singing live then. So this isn’t really a lets give this a try, it’s been going on for several years.

    • Rachel

      I knew she had at least 1 album. All i’m saying is I feel that she should stick to acting. The kids I use to watch loved her show and from the few times I watched it with them she didn’t seem to bad. I guess I just feel like all the young teen sensations try to do the whole movie/tv/album/book package and they end up flopping at everything because they spread themselves to thin and never really find what they’re good at.

    • pinkbaby1995

      her vocal range is not that big in her songs….thats why she has good lives,her songs arent like I have nothing by whitney houston

  • Joan Rivers

    You do know that girl that Joe made the video for is a senior at Pepperdine University right? I mean a school that you couldn’t have gotten into in a thousand years. Get your facts straight before you talk crap because then its at least funny.

    • Jenni

      Joan Rivers! So good to see you up and active and as sharp as ever. Love your work!

    • Smarter than you.

      Your attempts to be snarky when called out on your mistakes always fail. Obviously, you can’t find enough factual information out there to fulfill your goal of making the Jonas guys look bad so you resort to making up lies. Your desperation would be cute if it wasn’t so pathetic.

    • Jenni

      A stylist once told me that I wore desperation. It really brought out the pathetic in my eyes. So thank you.

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      Yeah Jenni, I’ve been meaning to tell you, you look really nice today.

    • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

      Nah I disagree with my former “what you really should be doing” comment. Today I have changed it to “stand up comedy.”

  • Andy Jonas

    First of all, he has the right to say anything he wants. He doesn’t have to like Selena Gomez. He’s way more talented than her. He has a wonderful voice, he plays amazingly the guitar and is such an amazing songwriter. And Being honest, Selena doesn’t have those qualities. She’s a plastic artist and she definitely should stick to movies. There you go Kevin. Well said!

  • Michael

    Hahha that dude became my idol now. He’s damn right, besides she’s so ugly, Selena sings hideous. Disgusting

    • Jen

      Okay micheal, you’re idol is a washed up boy band son of a bitch. Wow. No wonder you’re so fucked up.
      Overrated, was the fucking Jonas brothers who’s songs sucked ass. Their tv show was even worst. What little fucking kid gave a damn about them, that show was the worst on Disney channel and got canceled once their 7 minute of fame ended. He should take his own advice, some ppl should stick to movies other should stick to being a burnout. Because well, you became one for a reason.

    • Mia

      Lol bitter selena stans (or what’s the stupid name you use?) are hilarious.

  • Penny T

    Off topic, but can I just say that I would pay a lot of money to never hear that old man say the word “tweeps” again? #tryingsoooohard

  • Cee

    Hah! Alexis wanted a battle between Selena and Demi, instead she got one between Selena and Kevin who is clearly being a hypocrite. I mean, wasn’t he the non singing one of the group that just had to be added so it wouldn’t be the Jonas Duo? Hes like the Kevin of the Backstreet Boys, the Chris of the N’Sync, the Posh (well sorta) of the Spice Girls…so on and now hes on one of the dullest and saddest reality shows (his poor wife, really).

    • Alexis Rhiannon

      I will settle for a feud in any form.

  • http://www.facebook.com/gabrielle2lastnames Gabrielle Hanson-Moore

    Jenni you just hurt my feelings. Most people have no idea how much Kevin is actually singing in all of their songs. :/ But he’s totes right about Selena. She should have left the stage with Kim Kardashian while she still had her dignity…

  • pinkbaby1995

    I have seen far too many singers like selena gomez in the kpop industry,they got the “I can’t sing? so what? this is MY dream” mindset because they think being pretty is good enough.Nobody will remember them as good singers in 10 years if they can’t sing or at least have some dance skills where they have none