Season 4 of Arrested Development on Netflix is almost here (May 26th can’t come soon enough), so we’re preparing by taking a peek inside our favorite characters’ television yearbooks, if you will, complete with superlatives, parting quotes, and the messages we wish we could write to them. We’ll be giving you one for each character leading up to the season premiere. Since today is Alia Shawkat’s 24th birthday, we thought it would be appropriate to start with everyone’s favorite studio exec and George Michael’s favorite cousin, Maeby Fünke.
Most Likely To… emerge as the most successful member of the Bluth/Fünke clan in Season 4, even if by pure luck.
Parting Quote: “Marry me!”
Clubs/Activities: Extracurricular job at Tantamount Studios; professional banana-thrower-outer; female lead… er, male lead… no, female lead in school production of Much Ado About Nothing.
Video Yearbook Entry:
Maeby decided to take an interest in religion, and it was caught on film.
A Few Yearbook Notes To Maeby From Her Friends And Loved Ones:
Steve Holt wrote, “Steve Holt!”
Tobias Fünke wrote, “Seems like only yesterday you were bursting forth from your mother’s fertile womb!” Love, Dad
Lindsay Fünke wrote, “You are now punished. I punish thee.” Love, Mom
Lucille Bluth wrote, “Here’s some money. Go see a Star War.” Love, Gangy
Michael Bluth wrote, “Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight… hang on…” Love, Uncle Michael
George Michael Bluth wrote, “Anything can happen when two people share a cell, ‘cos.” Love, your COUSIN George Michael
And Here’s How We Wish We Could Sign Maeby’s Yearbook:
Everyone always says your Uncle Michael has it the most put together in your family, but we know how with-it you are, too. Sure, you might get a C m-i-n-e-s (correct spelling) on a test sometimes – without even studying! – but you’ve got street smarts. People don’t give you enough credit. Who else would go to such elaborate lengths to avoid writing a book report? We loved what you did with The Old Man and the Sea. And you totally saw Mrs. Featherbottom for the imposter that she was. Your parents aren’t exactly the best (What’s the deal with those cut-offs?), but you’re pretty well-adjusted. And you’re funny, too. Hopefully we’ll get a chance to see that more when we reunite with you next month. You’re the best, Maeby! We toast a Virgin Mary to you! Wait, there’s no alcohol in that. Get this girl a Virgin Pina Colada, stat! Now we’ll get things started. In conclusion, we just want to say: Marry us!
A Special Tribute To Surely Fünke
We would also like to pay tribute to Maeby’s wheelchair-bound twin sister Surely, who passed away of B.S. just before graduation, so everyone got really sad before prom. It’s too bad all that money everyone donated to her cause didn’t make a difference. That’s B.S. for you, I guess.
Want to see the previous Arrested Development Yearbooks? Come on! Of course you do: LINDSAY BLUTH FUNKE, GEORGE MICHAEL BLUTH, GEORGE BLUTH SR, LUCILLE BLUTH, MICHAEL BLUTH, GOB BLUTH, BUSTER BLUTH and TOBIAS FUNKE.