• Sat, Apr 13 2013

Oh Snap: Drake Calls Chris Brown ‘Insecure’ Which Is Probably The Nicest Thing Anyone Can Say About Him

Drake Calls Out Chris Brown And Rihanna 12-5-12

Since the dawn of time, during at least one time in their lives, women always leave a good guy for a complete asshole.  Even beautiful, talented, reefer-loving women with lots of money and devoted fans.  Reading about Drake‘s recent radio interview–in which he handled himself in a better manner than Chris Brown ever will simply by not throw furniture around–proves that even famous, incredibly good-looking and wealthy celebrities can still be involved in love triangles of despair.  And we all love a good celebrity feud.

Drake = The Good Guy in this scenario.  I’m even kinda getting why Amanda Bynes would want him to kill her cooch and why every teenage girl Instagrams Drake quotes 5x a day.  Even though he refused to say Rihanna‘s name directly, he pointed out that he treated her “with respect.”  Crazy! Yuck, who would want that?  Certainly not a couple who breaks up and gets back together more often than Jenelle Evans and… everyone.  But there’s more:

“Don’t ask me shit about that man when I come up there and leave that man alone. Stop preying on his insecurities. His insecurities are the fact that I make better music than him, that I’m more popping than him and that at one point in life the woman that he loves fell into my lap.”

 

Awwww shit, son!  While I think that Chris Brown’s insecurities are the least of his problems and that a personality disorder or two is probably a better focus, I think this was a good answer.  Thoughtful, appropriately hip-hoppy enough, and still got a dig in.  Since that’s pretty much the exact order in which I answer all of my major life questions, I’m inclined to agree.

When egged on for a response to a lyric from Chris Brown’s “R.I.P. Remix” last month where he says something on the level of ignorance that’s become atypical of him about Drake “coming out of the closet,” Drake said: ”I don’t wanna hear that man rap, nobody wants to hear me rap against him. I really do this shit.”

Oh-Em-Gee, you guys… what if there was a West Side Story rap-off between Chris Brown and Drake someday?  And they’re just going at it–rapping and snapping and plié-ing all over the place?  And Rihanna would be all “Tonight, tonight” while sitting on a fire escape ledge while getting high to forget about it all.

BRB, gotta go pitch this idea to someone important.

(Photo: WENN)

You can reach this post's author, Cassandra Hough, on twitter.
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