I’ve been struggling lately with what exactly my opinions are about feminism and motherhood and whatever, and wouldn’t you know it, Michelle Williams put her talented and self-aware finger right exactly on what’s been bothering me. Something about the way celebrities have been talking about their lives and the way the media has been responding to it lately has been making me think a lot, and I finally just got some closure by reading this quote by Michelle about her daughter, Matilda, and why she herself isn’t working on any side projects right now:
“Raising the kid is the work, yeah. And it’s amazing, and it’s the ultimate creative act. That’s my side project and my center project. I wish I had side projects! I’m kind of like a ‘one thing at a time’ girl. I can’t really take on [more]. I wish I was one of those people who’s also taking lots of photos and going to cooking classes. But I just work and raise the kid. That’s all I can do.”
You hear that? Did you hear what she said? She said, “That’s all I can do,” without feeling the need to shame other women for doing less or more, and without doing what Drew Barrymore did, which was to make a blanket statement about the capabilities of all women. She said, “Unfortunately, I was raised in this like generation of like, ‘Women can have it all,’ and I don’t think you can.” I read that, and I responded to it, but I still couldn’t figure out why it bothered me so much. Now, though, I think I have some insight on it — I just want women and people and everyone to stick to speaking about either their own opinions or things that pertain only to them. I’m sure people have big ‘ol problems with things I write on this site, but I make a pretty big point of either using humor or sticking to statements like ‘I think’ or ‘I feel’ or ‘in my opinion’.
This is also a big part of why I got so annoyed at everyone getting on Beyonce‘s case for this stupid Mrs. Carter tour thing. Why is it anyone’s business but Beyonce’s what she wants to name her tour? Or how she defines her own femism? She’s only speaking for herself, as is Michelle Williams. If Michelle wants to focus solely on her kid and her main projects without taking on side projects like photography or cooking, then good for her! I’m glad she knows her priorities and elects not to overextend herself on things she doesn’t enjoy as much. Good for her, and it’s none of my business. As women and humans, none of us has any obligation to the rest of us, so let’s just keep being like Michelle and speaking for ourselves. And if you have an adorable daughter like Matilda in the bargain, that really can’t hurt.
(Image: Joel Ginsburg / WENN.com)