I can’t get enough of Gwyneth Paltrow lately. Between her GOOP newsletters and her cookbooks old and new, I could be entertained for weeks. Since Gwyneth has kept pretty quiet about the overall reaction to her book, and because she actually wrote the book and therefore must wholeheartedly believe everything she wrote and takes it seriously, I don’t exactly feel sorry for her at the moment.
Gone is the fun, down-to-earth Gwyneth of Shallow Hal. Instead, she’s been replaced by a madwoman who thinks everyone in America (or the world, really) should spend $25 on a jar of honey and make their daily breakfasts from the nests of ducks. In order to properly give Old Gwyneth an official send-off to make way for new, out-of-touch-is-an-understatement Gwyneth, here are my 5 favorite reviews of her new cookbook, It’s All Good, which came out earlier this week.
1.) “It’s All Good is drenched in a chatty faux-populism that could only come from a rich person fearlessly boasting about her life of privilege.”- Eater.com.
2.) “The book reads like the manifesto to some sort of creepy healthy-girl sorority with members who use beet juice rather than permanent marker to circle the ‘problem areas’ on each other’s bodies.” -New York Post.
3.) “It’s All Good seems to take laughable Hollywood neuroticism about eating to the next level.” -The Atlantic
4.) “Seriously Gwyneth, we want to eat with you. But we can’t afford it. Unless you’re buying, Of course.” -Yahoo
And this last one comes from none other than Gwyneth herself, who by no means compares to Jennifer Garner in terms of being the best celebrity mom ever, but is aware that this book may be served with a little backlash:
5.) “One of my most negative qualities is this perfectionism that I have, and I think that I unconsciously project that because it comes from self-doubt and insecurity, and that’s the ironic part. I’m so deeply flawed. I’m just a normal mother with the same struggles as any other mother who’s trying to do everything at once and trying to be a wife and maintain a relationship.” -USA Today
Well most normal mothers would struggle fighting with ducks for their eggs, or hunting down earthenware bowls, butcher block countertops, Global knives, a Vitamix blender, and a Le Creuset Dutch oven at their local grocery store or Target. But to each their own, I guess. If you need me, I’ll be eating a grilled cheese from the farm of Le Kraft Singles.