Has anybody else noticed that Nicole Richie has been looking a little different lately? I’m not talking about the fact that she doesn’t have Paris Hilton perched on her shoulder anymore like a rich blonde parrot, that stopped happening years ago. No, I’m talking about her demeanor in general. Other sites are calling her out on losing weight to an unhealthy degree, saying that “she looked unbelievably thin” at Paris Fashion Week. It’s probably at the forefront of of people’s minds given that Nicole has an ongoing battle with anorexia, for which she received treatment in 2006. And while we here at Crushable hope that she’s okay and trust that the people around her are making sure she’s happy and healthy…has anyone considered that Nicole might be auditioning for a role as the third Olsen twin?
Think about it, Nicole has proven in the past with all that The Simple Life nonsense with Paris that she likes to go through life with a buddy. Sure, she’s married to Joel Madden, but she needs a girl buddy who understands fashion and being rich and partying and having fun. And what’s better than one buddy? TWO BUDDIES! Two matching buddies! She’s definitely auditioning for a spot next to Mary-Kate and Ashley, I know it. Look at the way she’s done her eye makeup; she’s mastered the plaintive puppy-gaze. And the prune face with the little-bit-too-heavy-makeup? She’s so on her way to being just another one of the Olsen twins — you know, dating old rich guys and building prescription pill backpacks and stuff.
But lest you get any ideas and start calling them the Olsen triplets, you better cut that shit out. Even if there are three of them, they’ll be called the Olsen twins until the day they put me in the earth. That rule is written into the bylaws of our Constitutio and must never be broken.
(Image: Pascal Le Segretain / Getty Images)