So according to TMZ, Suri Cruise has a body double now? What new Scientology devilry is this?? I get that Suri is famous and all — she’s the daughter of Katie Holmes, the mildest, side talking-est brunette in all of showbiz, and Tom Cruise, the smallest, springiest Scientology elf there ever was. But she’s also six years old, so why exactly does she an identical copy of herself roaming the city with her visiting parks and eating fro-yo? TMZ has separate pictures of the two dressed exactly alike — in blue parkas, black tights, and brown Uggs with pink soles — just wearing different colored hats.
Wait but I don’t get this! She’s six! It’s not like she’s a famous inventor who holds the secrets to nuclear fusion in her brain and you’d have to capture and tickle them out of her. She’s just a normal, famous little girl who, judging by her constant koala-grip on her parents, doesn’t like to walk or smile or see the sunshine. It’s probably how I would be if I grew up famous, too. I don’t even like talking to people that I do know, so I can’t imagine I’d be obsessed with being followed around by strangers with cameras. But I think you’d have to be crazy to try to kidnap her with all the security surrounding her, so what’s the deal here? Is it just a coincidence that the girls looked the same that day, or is that seriously a body double? And if it is, which six-year old’s mother is willing to sell her into body double slavery? WHAT’S GOING ON HERE.
Actually I better just calm down, because Suri is probably only allowed to hang out with other little girls who look exactly like her. I have heard much weirder things about Scientology.
(Image: Mr. Blue / WENN.com)