Is Ben Affleck Trying To Tell Us That He And Jennifer Garner Are Headed For Divorce?

2013 Vanity Fair Oscar Party at Sunset Tower - ArrivalsHere’s a little something you should know about me, guys — I may be sarcastic and snarky and a little extremely off-putting, but I am extremely naive about marriage. Even though my own parents and the parents of approximately everyone I know are not together, whenever a new couple gets married, I assume they’ll be together forever.

Like Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner, for example. I assume that because they have three kids and hold hands in public and touch foreheads when they talk, that their marriage is a happy one. It’s respectful and loving and domestic, and you can tell just by the way these two look into each others’ eyes that they’ll be together forever. But also by that marriage contract they made. Which no one ever breaks or has broken or will break and so on. And then I remember…these people are strangers to me. I don’t know them now and will almost certainly never meet them. The information that goes into my brainholes about them is filtered through paparazzi shots, publicity statements, and magazine interviews, so I’m pretty much in thrall to whatever they want to tell me about their situation. Which is why I was so caught off guard last night when Ben, giving a speech onstage for his film Argo‘s Best Picture win, didn’t just thank his wife and tell her he loved her, like I was expecting. Instead, he said this:

“I wanna thank our friends in Iran, living under terrible circumstances right now. I wanna thank my wife, who I don’t normally associate with Iran…but I wanna thank you for working on our marriage for ten Christmases. It’s good. It is work, but it’s the best kind of work. And there’s no one I’d rather work with!”

Wait but Ben! Why! Why do you make me worry like this? Couldn’t you have stopped your ‘thank you’ after the funny Iran comment? You thanked her, I’m on board, I’m ready for the understandably bitter references to not being nominated for Best Director (no but seriously, what?). But instead it’s like a joke about how you’re in marriage counseling, but maybe you’re not? And maybe you don’t like your relationship, but you like it better than any other one you could imagine being in. “And it’s good! Yeah, no, it’s good. I don’t hate it. I mean I don’t like it, but it’s not bad. Who’s gonna be happy all the time? It’s a decent relationship, I’m fine with it.”

You’ve sent my whole world into a tailspin, guys. I came into work today and my editor Jenni told me that there are rumors and blind items suggesting that Ben is bored with their relationship and wants out — that Jen is super domestic and likes to be home, and Ben is over it. So I guess it’s time for the Ben Affleck Jennifer Garner divorce rumors to begin. But…I…no! I won’t stand for it! You guys are the only solid relationship in my life! You and your forehead touches are all I have left!

(Image: Brian To /

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    • lulu
      Are you serious! All relationships are work, we all know that
      Watch this video from the afterparty, Ben talks about that
      They are not in marriage counseling theyre actually really good right now
      And if you saw their pics at the governors and vf afterparty they were clearly very happy together

      • Jenni

        Um, yeah also all marriage have dry spells. But you don’t need to talk about that while accepting an award…..

      • Rachel Finnagan

        Agree. He meant well, I’m sure. And he’s right that marriages require work, but the Oscars aren’t the time or the place for those comments. He did so well at the Golden Globes! What happened?

    • 1RIPMindy1

      How rude was that in front of the entire world! He didn’t need to use that forum to reference that his marriage is “work.” Especially after she has been so supportive of him throughout this process. The status of their marriage is nobody’s business. He chose to cast a shadow on this Oscar win. A simple “thank you” would have worked just fine.

      • Jenni

        Every time he talks about his family, it starts out really sweetly. Then gets incredibly awkward because he keeps going. See his Critics Choice acceptance speech for a lovely example of how not to talk about your children.

      • AHx333

        Exactly… he thanks his wife for all HER work in the marriage…. yet when he talks about female co-stars, he always GUSHES about beautiful and wonderful they are. I am sorry, but we have all heard the non-stop rumors about his cheating, gambling and substance abuse, and this shows me that he thinks Jennifer and his kids are just a project he has to maintain (for good PR perhaps?). Yeah, Ben, marriage takes work… YOUR work too. If you are not happy in your marriage and need to look for excitement elsewhere, maybe it’s time to be honest with your WIFE who is working so hard for you.

    • Penelope

      Marriage IS work. Good for Ben for being honest about it. It’s the best work in the world, with your favourite person in the world, but it’s work, no matter who you are.

      • Alexis Rhiannon

        I’m sure it is, but as someone with no experience of that fact, I was pretty jarred when it came up in a minute-long speech, y’know?

    • AmyAnnMaria

      Um, marriage is work. Every day it is work. If people think otherwise then they are living in a dream world. I don’t understand why everyone is up in arms about this.

    • Helen

      Why are you searching for bad stuff? t pisses me off people who are spreading rumors. I thought his speech was well done; it actually made me cry and you could see the emotion in Jennifer’s eyes. We can make lots of assumptions about their marriage like you could assume that maybe he’s been absent for a long time and that she’s been insecure which would explain “there’s no one I’d rather work with” etc but at the end of the day it’s not our business. But if you must know I preferred his Golden Globes speech: “And I want to thank my wife. She’s the reason I’m standing here. I adore
      you, I love you so much. Thanks for sitting through this. You’re my

      • jenley2013

        That was!

    • Kristina

      Seriously?! You’re right, you don’t know anything about their private life! Maybe for once, they are the example of a true couple who doesn’t fake anything like most Hollywood people do. I won’t deny they have ups and downs; obviously every couple does but maybe their couple is strong enough to overcome them :) Why would you think the worst only because they look “too perfect”? Please… Maybe your problem is that you don’t know a lot of people who are still together after so many years that you can’t believe in their marriage. And seriously, writing a whole article questioning that is pretty lame.

    • Puckersbabe

      Okay, you are way over thinking this. He is correct, marriage is work, and he has been working on projects while she has been taking care of the kids. I see it as a thank you for all that you do, and for keeping our family together. We know they love each other, you can see it. I definitely don’t take his speech as a divorce that is coming.

    • MEXNER

      He seemed “coked up” to me.

    • Steph

      Marriage is totally work. I’ve only been married for a year and a half and it’s been tough at times, so I can only imagine how I’ll feel in another 8 1/2. I wouldn’t read too much into it, really.

    • jenley2013

      I didn’t get a bad vibe off his speech at all!! And if I’m not mistaken it wasn’t the first time he’s mentioned her after Iran or something and then commented about it.
      I ship them and hope they’re together forever. Well, I sorta ship them. Shipping real couples is too easy, shipping 2 individuals and pretending they’re a couple is WAY better (ahem, Bradley Cooper and Jennifer Lawrence).

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    • Anne

      “Thank you for working on our marriage for 10 Christmases. It is work, but it’s the best kind of work, and there’s no one I’d rather work with.” I loved it

      as well Jennifer, who seemed really appreciate it.

      Nothing wrong on what he said. In fact, that (working on marriage) is what true love is about.

    • Devara

      The look on her face was what really told the tale – I have a feeling he got an earful later!

    • ChimChim

      She needs to quit with the goofy mommy clothes and Martha Stewart shat, and start looking kiss-@ss like she did back in her “Alias” days. Nothing like a skin-tight cat suit to put a little zing in the marriage.

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