I almost feel bad for Taylor Swift right now. After attempting to publicly humiliate her ex-boyfriendish Harry Styles at the 2013 Grammys by speaking in a British accent, he responded by publicly complimenting her performance at last night’s BRIT awards. Us Weekly spoke to the better-haired half of the notorious why-are-we-still-talking-about-their-two-week-relationship couple and he played the good guy card.
Afterward, Styles had nothing but plaudits for his Swift’s hot makeover. “Great!” Styles told Us Weekly of the performance during the Sony and Belvedere after party at the Art’s Club on Dover Street. “She always puts on a good show.”
This certainly puts her quite the pickle now, doesn’t it. She’s made it pretty clear that she’s working out her feelings about Harry Styles by making new music. And since we all know she’s always the victim when it comes to dating, she’s going to have to work pretty hard to make Harry Styles look bad. Especially now that she’s on the record being a catty middle school girl and he’s on the record being a supportive ex-boyfriend.
What to do, what to do? Besides frame him for attempted murder. Which I have no doubt she’s debating right now. That and forcing him to drown a bag full of puppies on camera could turn the public against him. After all, her entire brand depends on her being repeatedly shafted by horrible guys. Guys who are so absolutely despicable that it’s completely acceptable to write an entire song about them. And then pretend that it’s some kind of therapeutic endeavor that happened to find it’s way onto iTunes.
But alas she made a mistake with the set-up this time around. Or someone made a mistake. I do pity the fool on her marketing team who suggested Styles. He’s too well-liked for this kind of game playing and he’s clearly way too media savvy to fall into the trap she set. So bummer. Maybe next time around she choose someone who’s more likely to engage in her blame game. Could we be so bold as to suggest Mel Gibson? Or Donald Trump? Or, or, or Charlie Sheen?!