If there’s one thing I love more than reality TV shows, it’s model reality TV shows like The Face. If there’s one thing I love even more than model reality TV shows, it’s British people on model reality TV shows (well, honestly any reality series – Lisa Vanderpump, I’m talking to you). That’s why I’m super excited about The Face. They have not one, but two gorgeous Brits to satisfy my Anglophile and model reality TV show hunger. The season premiere was last night and it was game on, bitches. Having watched the pre-premiere special, The Fight to Make the Final 12, I’m well-versed in my model hopefuls and I’ve already picked my favs. And no, I don’t feel one bit naughty about all the time I’ll spend watching and judging these model wannabes while eating a gigantic bag of peanut butter M&Ms.
Well, the opera gloves are off and the shellac’d nails are out…it’s go time for the 12 finalists who have made it to the NYC loft and onto one of the three model coaches’ teams…Team Naomi Campbell, Team Coco Rocha and Team Karolina Kurkova (finally, hashtags that actually mean something). Nigel Barker’s sexy voice proclaims NYC the “fashion capital of the world” and we get started with our girls coming straight from their final audition round, right up to their swanky and exposed loft. Where, no doubt, there will be plenty of crying, yelling, changing –and probably very little eating.
Let’s talk about Sandra Woodley. As a self-proclaimed obnoxiously and often inappropriately loud and excited woman, I can sorta understand where she’s coming from but, DAMN girl! Hold it down a little. This is a model marathon, not a sprint. She comes in all Snowstorm Nemoy and gets a lot of hateful looks from a loft full of women who are trying to get paid, solely on looks. We get it, Sandra Dee…you’re from Philly, you ran out of f***s to give, and you’re ready to win this joint. Dial it down a few notches and you may even make it without having to punch a bitch out. It’s just so right that she’s on Team Naomi. So. Very. Right. It made my tiny little Anglophile, reality TV show-loving heart grow three sizes that day. Devyn (no last name, like Madonna) is not impressed. She knows that smiling does not go with Christian Lacroix, and she’s in it to win it too…just much more quietly.