Here’s the bad news: Kim Kardashian’s using her pregnancy as a reason to eat whatever she wants. WHATEVER! As we now know from the investigation team at Daily Mail Fatass Watch Incorporated, she bought TWO frozen yogurts. That’s TWO more than any human being should eat. Frozen yogurt? She might as well goto Costco, buy aÂ barrelÂ ofÂ mayonnaiseÂ and shoot it into her veins. No I’m sorry that’s being too generous. I mean there’s splurging and there’s SPLURGING and there’s DIABETES. I don’t even knowÂ whatÂ to say about this really, besides to beg her to get help asap. Like as soon as she finishes reading this article and sharing it on her Twiter, she should get help.
Medical experts now say she’s just one frozen yogurt away from turning into a human blob. Just one. And that’s without toppings. God help her if she dares to even reach for thoseÂ sprinkles. Â Why, she’d be rushed onto the set of TLC’s upcoming docudrama “Incredibly Fat People with Incredibly Popular Sex Tapes” so fast than Kris Jenner wouldn’t even time to pitch her own version of the show to E!.
Is there a silver lining to this entire story? Yes, yes there is. And it’s that despite teasing the story on the homepage as something horrific, they admit in the actual article that she may (and this is a strong may) have been purchasing the second cup of frozen yogurt for someone else.Â
But on Tuesday afternoon, the couple decided to enjoy some downtime together with a trip toÂ PinkberryÂ frozen yoghurt shop.Â After casting her eye over several flavours and toppings, Kim decided on a flavour for herself, as well as carrying another portion, believed to be for either her mother Kris or sister Khloe, who joined the pair on the outing. Â The pregnant star was seen carrying what appeared to be a cup of caramel flavour yoghurt with caramel curls on top, as well as a plain flavour.
Let’s just pray that the plain flavour (you win Britain) was for her. And you know I’m saying that for totally duh reasons.