• Wed, Feb 6 2013

Every ’90s Kid Understands Why Jennifer Lawrence Stalked John Stamos

Jennifer Lawrence Stalking John Stamos

How does Jennifer Lawrence continue to ace every single interview she does? Is it witchcraft? It could be, right? I mean, I don’t watch Hocus Pocus in the off season for fun. I would by lying if I didn’t admit that it’s a pretty strong diagnositcal tool when it comes to detecting black magic on late night TV shows. So I’m just throwing it out there. If someone flying around on a broom happens to catch it, so be it.

Anyways, Jennifer Lawrence went on Conan last night to presumably talk about the 2013 Academy Awards and Silver Linings Playbook. But because she’s J.Law, the convo quickly turned into a story about how she once stalked John Stamos at a party. Conan was all like, “really, her?” As if it’s surprising that someone would want to stalk John Stamos.

But tell you what Conan, us kids of the ’90s kinda love John Stamos. He’s the cool bug-exterminatin’ music-playin’ uncle who lived in our attic that we never had. Now, I will say that my uncle, like Uncle Jesse, also suffered from a rare case of only-famous-in-Japanitis. But he didn’t marry my father’s co-worker and then reproduce on some kind of murphy bed in my attic. So he’s nowhere near as cool. I completely understand why J.Law lost her shit around him.

Joey, on the hand, I’d avoid. No one wants a failed stand-up comic living in their basement. Sorry I’m not sorry that he always made me slightly uncomfortable. Hey Danny! If there’s a grown man living in your basement who regularly talks to a puppet on his hand, there’s a problem in your basement.

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  • Lauren

    I understand Jennifer’s struggle with coherency. I met John Stamos in August. I was in the theatre district because I was seeing a show that night and I was walking around waiting for it to be time to go, because I work in midtown and didn’t want to leave and then come back after work. So I spotted a nut cart on a corner and was heading towards it when all of a sudden a majestic beauty started walking my way. It was John Stamos. He was doing a play and was heading over to the theater for the half hour call. I stopped him, asked for a picture, told him I loved him and that I had eaten Oikos Greek yogurt that day so that commercial was totally true (that was when he has the commercial where if you eat Oikos Greek yogurt he appears) and I was immediately mortified that I had said that to him. But he was so nice to me and smelled delicious. The entire time I was just thinking “Please don’t call him Uncle Jesse”. But after I was all HAVE MERCY!

    It was also funny because I had told a friend of mine that I was going to stalk John Stamos while he was in the city as a joke, and then I really did meet him. Wish fulfillment.

    • Jenni

      The best thing about John Stamos is that he’s aging Rob Lowe style, only getting better looking with age. It’s ah-mazing.

    • http://twitter.com/Y2Jin99 The Goat

      Spotted on the set of General Hospital. Don’t be shocked if he is on the show for the 50th anniversary. They are bringing back everyone.

    • http://twitter.com/Y2Jin99 The Goat

      Spotted on the set of General Hospital. Don’t be shocked if he is on the show for the 50th anniversary. They are bringing back everyone.

  • jenley2013

    On one hand, I want her to have a life, on the other… I want her to never stop doing televised interviews.

    • Jenni

      Haha same! After Oscars season she’ll go MIA for a bit.

    • jenley2013

      I know, I’m gonna have to get my life back in order when there will be less youtube stalking time to do… but I’m thinking the Serena promotion will start in like July-August?

    • Jenni

      Ha yes, and then Catching Fire will be huge in the fall. So only a few months off.