• Wed, Feb 6 2013

I’m Truly Starting To Believe That Chris Brown Has Comprehension Problems

Chris Brown 2013

Yesterday the news broke that Chris Brown allegedly faked several of his court-mandated community service hours. You know, those hours that he claimed should get all these horrible haters off his back. He did the crime, he served the time and now he just wants to make music without people talking about the time he bashed in Rihanna’s face. Yep, those hours.

While we’re still in the alleged phase of this entire incident, I think it’s safe to say that there’s probably some credibility behind these reports. Mostly because they’re coming from a motion filed by the deputy district attorney. I don’t think the deputy district attorney’s usually known for starting rumors and stirring up trouble.

But of course Chris Brown did not use this moment to make any kind of mature public statement. Nope, he took to his private Instagram account and went on some kind of tirade about how he’s sick of being persecuted.  I’m truly baffled as to how he’s once again twisted the situation around to make himself the victim.

chris brown private instagram

Here’s the gist of it: “I just want to make music and I’m sick and tired of everyone bringing up the time I attacked Frank Ocean as well as the time I faked community service hours for attacking Rihanna. And speaking of Rihanna, I’m so tired of talking about the time I beat her up. Is it so much to ask that people stop criticizing me for horrible things I do?”

Yes Chris Brown, it is so much to ask. Just because you want to do something, doesn’t mean you get to do something. Unlike you, the rest of us aren’t living in some kind of consequence-free universe where you get to do what you want, when you want.

That’s a lesson that most people learn in kindergarten. If you’re on time-out, your mother doesn’t really care that you want to play with your train set. Even if you’re really good at building train sets. Even if you’re the best goddamn train set builder in your entire kindergarten class. If you’re on time-out, you’re on time out. This is a basic humanity lesson Chris Brown somehow fails to grasp.

In what world are people wrong for talking about the fact that he attacked another human being? On what planet are we supposed to pretend that making up community service hours doesn’t matter. ESPECIALLY WHEN LAST WEEK’S INCIDENT PROVES HE’ STILL UNABLE TO CONTROL HIS ANGER. Sorry to use all caps, but I’m just so fucking confused when it comes to his logic.

You know what a rational human being who cares about reputation would come out and say right now, “Don’t believe what you’re hearing in the media, I did not make up any of my community service hours. However if there’s any kind of discrepancy, I’ll take it upon myself to complete more hours as soon as possible.”

But Chris Brown isn’t rational. Or apparently even on his own PR team. As always, he makes his own situation worse by having a public temper tantrum. And that’s what I’m truly starting to believe that’s something missing up there in that brain of his. I can’t understand what he doesn’t comprehend about the situation that he put himself in.

(Photo: Greg Tidwell, PacificCoastNews.com)

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