It has long been a running joke on Jimmy Kimmel Live! that Jimmy Kimmel bumps Matt Damon off of every show just to fuck with him. Well, last night, Matt Damon finally took his revenge by tying Jimmy up and taking over the show, enlisting many of his famous friends to help. And it was quite revealing!
In the first clip (above), Matt Damon reveals the reason for their feud: Jimmy Kimmel has auditioned for all of Matt Damon’s roles, and gotten none of them. Much to Jimmy’s chagrin, Matt Damon has obtained a reel of these terrible auditions and shows it. “How do you like them apples?” has never sounded so terrible!
Matt Damon being an a-list celebrity, he also got a bunch of famous friends to help him trash Jimmy, including Demi Moore, Nicole Kidman, Sheryl Crow (fronting the band), and Jimmy’s ex girlfriend, Sarah Silverman. (Whom, as we know, he has fucked.) It was an all-star cast of tormentors!
Nicole Kidman said she’s never done the Jimmy Kimmel show before because “he’s just, he’s not classy.” She also copped to being a kleptomaniac. (Matt Damon really is “the kind of guy you can tell anything to.”)
Gary Oldman tried to pretend he’d never been on the show before:
Amy Adams talked about how awful it was when Jimmy sexually harassed her:
Reese Witherspoon came in from the cold to show us her boozy groceries:
Demi Moore talked about the time Jimmy Kimmel pretended to make pizza from scratch, but she found out it was actually DiGiorno:
He even got Robin Williams to do a bit of stand-up:
Was this by far the best episode of Jimmy Kimmel Live ever aired? No doubt. ABC should probably just quit while they’re ahead and cancel it now.