Looks like Justin Bieber stole a move from Taylor Swift’s playbook with his new revenge single, “Yellow Raincoat.” While we’re not completely done with our Rosetta Stone course in passive-aggressive music lyrics, we’re pretty sure that this song is about his ex-girlfriend Selena Gomez. No scratch that. We’re not pretty sure, we’re downright positive that he wrote this song about her. Mostly because celebrities are legally obligated to write about the last famous person they dated. Also, in an in-depth article about the song, Hollywood Life says “it’s reportedly about his ex Selena Gomez! Lyrics such as, ‘Cause the fame, and the money, and the girl will drive you crazy,’ hint at his tumultuous relationship with Selena.” So yeah…
Before we begin our full analysis, let’s listen to the song. Just a quick warning before you press play: it’s a heart-wrenching song full of so many weather metaphors that you’re going to wish you could call Al Roker to help you understand what’s going on. But you can’t. Because Al Roker refuses to talk about pop music metaphors. Don’t even get him started on the scientific inaccuracies behind “It’s Raining Men.”
Now that you’ve listened to America’s new go-to break-up song, it’s time to talk about it. More specifically, how we really know that it’s about Selena Gomez.
First of it all, it mentions a girl. Is Selena Gomez a girl? Um, give me a second to look up biology on Wikipedia….okay….reading up on this…yes,confirmed, Selena Gomez is a girl! Second of all, it mentions a yellow raincoat. Did Hollywood Life find a photo of Selena Gomez wearing a yellow raincoat in December 2012? Yes, yes they did.
Third of all, duh. How could this song not be about Selena Gomez? It’s clinically impossible for it to be about some other girl and some other raincoat. Not when we have so much proof sitting in front of our faces. Seriously, have you ever even seen someone wear a yellow raincoat besides Selena? I certainly haven’t.
(Photo: Hall/Pena, PacificCoastNews.com)