• Sun, Jan 13 2013

Olivia Wilde And Jason Sudeikis Officially Engaged, Probably Having Kenyan Marathon Sex Right Now

Olivia Wilde Jason Sudeikis

Funny guys usually have good luck getting a hot girl to spend the night with them every now and then, but Saturday Night Live‘s Jason Sudeikis gets them to spend eternity with him.  USA Today is reporting that he asked his ladylove Olivia Wilde to marry him “shortly after the holidays.”

In case you aren’t familiar with Olivia Wilde, she’s an incredibly gorgeous actress who is recently divorced from an Italian prince who now gets to spend the rest of her life (or at least a few solid years, I mean they are celebrities) with one of the funniest guys around.  Oh and they have amazing, mind-blowing, record-breaking sex.  Last fall, Olivia decided to share with the world that even beautiful women get sad after divorce:

“I felt like my vagina died,” she said. “Turned off. Lights out … And you can lie to your relatives at Christmas dinner and tell them everything on the home front is just peachy. But you cannot lie to your vagina.”

And then she met Jason and fell madly in love and told everyone that they “have sex like Kenyan marathon runners.”  There has been speculation that the two have been engaged and planning a Kansas wedding for awhile, but the cat is now officially out of the bag.  Or something.

Sigh.  I wish them well, but I don’t hold out high hopes.  I want these kids to make it work, but they’re both divorced and if Amy Poehler and Will Arnett can’t stay married, who can?  Oh well.  Congrats and mazel tov and all that other junk.  By the way, can SNL hurry up and come back on? I’m going through withdrawals.

(Photo: WENN)

 

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