This just in, guys: Megan Fox is not dead. Apparently Twitter does this thing where periodically for no reason, #RIP and then a celebrity name will start trending. Today it was Megan, and the response was just as calm and practical as you would expect from a nation of crazed social networkers from the anonymous comfort of their computers. While most of the posts were people asking why it was trending (and helpfully making it trend more), there were some really wildly inappropriate responses as well, that we’d like to share with you in hopes of publicly shaming their owners into being better human beings. Yeah right.
Starting off with a bang. Just so you guys know, this was an extremely popular comment. A lot of people couldn’t help but draw a comparison between a genocidal dictator who killed millions, and the fake death of a celebrity they’ve masturbated to in their dorm rooms. This guy’s deep in the bargaining stage. There’s probably some back story I don’t understand, but quite a few tweeters asked that Drake Bell be taken in Megan Fox’s place, next time. How heart-warming. Listen, she can’t be dead because this guy and his super classy handle didn’t even get a chance to sleep with her yet. Yeah, because her death is the only thing standing between the two of you really making a go of it. I’m certain. Wouldn’t that be great guys? Don’t you wish she really was dead? This is just a really good point. This all happened because Selena Gomez was considered the most beautiful multiple women in the world. It’s her fault. Another excellent point, and not at all offensive. The more parallels we can make between people who suffered in real situations and people who suffered zero percent on the internet, the better. Right but haven’t you noticed that? YOU IMBECILES?? That’s how Paula Tapia knows this is a hoax. You should go into a hole somewhere and think about what you just said. Right. Neither of those, and also you’re an idiot. Kind of an overshare.
(Image: Brian To / WENN.com / Twitter)