I remember in the glory days of American Idol when people actually watched it (I know it still has decent ratings, but where do these viewers live because I know 0 of them), Simon Cowell was the man. Sure he wore shirts that were too tight and too low, but his whole thing just worked. I never felt like he was being too unnecessarily mean just for ratings – seemed like he just said what he really thought, and most of the time I agreed with him.
And now…well now he just produced a show in Britain called That Dog Can Dance. Yeah, it’s a competition show where dogs compete. In dance. Maybe I’m missing something because I’m so not an animal person, but I’m pretty sure dogs don’t dance, they’re just forced to run around in circles to music by their owners. I don’t know, that may be just me.
Oh and while Simon Cowell’s dog dancing show was premiering and flopping the other day (only 3.7 million viewers), he was probably screwing Carmen Electra, because that’s a thing now. But the lynchpin in the tragic decline of Simon Cowell’s musical integrity is that he is allegedly now recruiting as X-Factor judges Katy Perry, Shania Twain, Jessica Simpson, and…Kim Kardashian.
First of all let’s just say that while I was totally taken in by Katy Perry’s movie and love her now so I’m fine with the choice, there’s no way in hell she does it. Shania Twain actually has a great voice so I’ll give him that. Even Jessica Simpson I’m pretty sure was originally famous for being a singer. But Kim Kardashian? At least try to pretend you care about something other than ratings for our benefit. It’s like, I’m fine with being duped and emotionally manipulated into watching shows, but at least try to disguise it. Oh how the respected have fallen.