Let’s Make This Clear Right Now, Taylor Swift Is Not A Slut

Taylor Swift Miley Cyrus Slut Tweet

Earlier this morning I had the pleasure and delight of seeing this Tweet from E!’s Ken Baker about the love lives of Miley Cyrus and Taylor Swift.

While I’d love to think I’m misinterpreting it, I’m pretty sure that it’s calling Taylor Swift a slut for dating 13 guys in the past 3 years. As anyone who reads Crushable on the reg knows, I’m not fan of Taylor Swift. But that doesn’t mean that I think it’s okay to call another woman a slut for dating a lot of men.

So let me be clear right now when I say that I don’t dislike Taylor Swift because she dates a lot of guys, I dislike Taylor Swift because I think she exploits those relationships for a profit while pretending that it’s all some kind of therapeutic exercise for her that has no effect on others. Personally I don’t think that promoting the message that your decisions have no consequences is right. Many of her choices comes off as extremely hypocritical to me and I don’t understand how she still pretends to be a victim in her own life when she’s one of the most successful musical artists of all time.

However that hypocrisy does not make her a bitch and it does not make her a slut.

There’s nothing wrong with dating around in your twenties, (or your thirties, forties. fifties, eighties etc.) and there’s also nothing wrong with settling down in your twenties. Miley’s choice to get engaged to a man she’s been dating for three years does not suddenly invalidate Taylor Swift’s choice to not do that. Just because Miley Cyrus isn’t a slut, doesn’t mean Taylor Swift is a huge one.

Thankfully that’s not the way that the world works. After several years of research we’ve learned that two women can make two different choices and still both be right. It’s neat how that happens. So while I’m always up to discuss Taylor Swift and Miley Cyrus, I would love to discuss both their choices in a setting that doesn’t involve ridiculous labels like “bitch” and “slut.”

It’s almost 2013, maybe we can stop using those words to talk about people we don’t like.

(Photo: Hall/Pena, PacificCoastNews.com)

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    • Sue

      “I dislike Taylor Swift because I think she exploits those relationships for a profit”
      Oh come on. If we decided that nobody gets to have an experience and write then sell a song about it, we would have to trash about 85% of all music. :)

      • Jenni

        I’m not saying she can’t sing about those relationships, I’m saying she can’t act like their feelings don’t count. Throughout her press tour for Red, she continually made fun of the fact that these guys were upset by her songs. As if most people would be totally cool with their ex singing a song about their personal experience.

      • Antonio, Always a Swiftie

        Ok, let me explain something… Taylor only named these guys three times, on Hey Stephen, that is a pretty cute song, Dear John and Teardrops in my guitar… The naming things are only in the minds of the sensationalist people… Most of the Taylor Swift songs were wroted based on books, movies and situations that happened with her friends and family… You can look it up on line and see that she wrote a lot of songs that do not talk about her love releashionships…

      • Soshiloveable

        john mayer kinds of deserves it sometimes LOL

      • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

        Men singers have been doing this forever. Where was your outrage towards them?

      • Jenni

        Name another male singer who recently debuted an entire album that’s not only about past relationships, but about specific famous women who he knows we all know — and then when asked in interviews about their feelings, laughs it off and says “I don’t want to hear about it.”

      • Soshiloveable

        people will be waiting for the day taylor gets a taste of her own medicine and will see if she has the guts to write bout her exes

      • http://ninnelson.com/ gigi5

        I remember reading an interview she did in which she said she avoids reading or listening to what people are saying about her. I think that is probably what she meant she didn’t want to hear about.

      • Jenni

        I remember this interview with Katie Couric where she laughed about the guys contacting her” http://www.crushable.com/2012/10/25/entertainment/taylor-swift-red-jake-gyllenhaal-john-mayer-meaning-136/

        and this one with Glamour where she called John Mayer presumptuous for thinking her song is about him: http://www.crushable.com/2012/10/01/entertainment/taylor-swift-lyrics-john-mayer-glamour-interview-448/

      • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

        JM may be presumptuous but I am not!

      • http://ninnelson.com/ gigi5

        That Glamour interview is the one I was thinking of. I think it’s a good example of why she doesn’t want to hear these things, she probably was trying to not say more things like the “presumptuous” remark. Anyway I see why you say what you say, I just have a different take on it.

        In the Katie Couric interview you can see she and Katie were both hamming it up for the audience and the audience loved it. I think it is her marketing gimmick.

        Who knows what she really thinks or feels. Even when she laughed, who knows why she laughed. It could be at herself, or at the silliness of it all.

        Didn’t John Mayer get in trouble with his fans a while back for saying things about his exes?

        There is a double standard here. If any of Taylor”s exes defend themselves I suppose they’ll just make it worse for themselves.

      • http://twilightirruption.blogspot.com/ abbeysbooks

        I would have to go back to the 40′s and 50′s to name you names. They don’t now of course as the PC Feminists would bury them. But male songwriters used to do this and people would dig at who they were referring to. Long long ago.

        Here’s are song lyrics I wrote for John Meyer. http://focusfree.blogspot.com/2011/08/lyrics-for-john-mayershotgun-eyes.html

        And haven’t you read Paglia on Taylor Swift yet and Perry too. Please interview her jenni. She is wonderful on this stuff. She is the one who put me on to Paula Jones having a porno mouth when she wrote in Wired that she knew Jones was telling the truth as soon as she saw a picture of her mouth. Then I thought, “Oh oh.” Chelsea has that kind of mouth but Hillary sure doesn’t.

    • http://ninnelson.com/ gigi5

      I think you had fun saying slut.

    • Ani Mosity

      LOL no one called Taylor a slut.

      • siriusthecat

        Taylor is a slut. I thought that before I knew shed been with more than a dozen. She’s 23. Holy crap. And it isn’t even about the number. If you still have semen in you from one man and your screwing another you are a whore(if paid) or a slut. Ever see the chics on maury that test 8-15 guys for paternity? That’s where that leads, or an STD or 3.

      • anon

        you are fucking revolting, you sexist piece of shit. hold your own gender up to these standards too, if you insist on holding them. or better yet, stop judging people’s worth on how many people they’ve had sex with. you disgust me.

      • siriusthecat

        You are just so articulate and bright. The only male associated with this handle is the actual cat named Sirius. It was an 18 year old college FEMALE that posted something silly here first. I’m her mother, also FEMALE. You have major issues and I recommend therapy. Reading
        books helps with communication skills as well. Maybe a little diet and exercise wouldnt hurt. You sound fat and bitter. Too many carbs maes people aggressive without exercise. Relax if you can people , wow. Its not that serious a topic. Who knew Taylor was a trailer park icon? She’s not that well liked around here and she sort of lives near here.

    • VaginaMonologue

      Thanks for all your really enlightening and responsive comments about Jenni’s thoughtful piece, guys!

    • Emmy

      Too bad Taylor Swift herself isn’t above slut-shaming. I’ve always been pretty indifferent to her, but the lyrics of her song “Better than Revenge” just seemed pretty pathetic.

      • Jenni

        “Fifteen” is pretty bad too

    • siriusthecat

      If a slut isn’t a girl jumping from man to man to boy to man, rinse, repeat. What is a slut? I don’t listen to her hillbilly music and could care less about her but a slut she is. Just banging two men/boys from the same family= slut. Just because she’s homely doesn’t make her less slutty. If a better looking girl behaved this way, people would lynch her. If my daughter acted like that I’d kill her. Who raised this girl? Does she have a dad?

      • Soshiloveable

        that is teen love/puppy love,and someday she’ll get out of that phase..hopefully

      • siriusthecat

        She’s 23 years old, not 16. Shes all grown up and has already had a lifetime s worth of sex mates. If men aren’t seeing damaged goods yet, it won’t be long.

      • Soshiloveable

        some people carry this phase into adulthood…when they do not learn lol

      • voiceofreason

        Your comments are revolting, sexist and wrong. People like you perpetrate the kind of thinking that belongs to more than a generation ago. If she was a male would you be so derogatory? Irrespective, it is not up to you to comment on the number of relationships she’s been in and then call her a slut. As you say, she is all grown up. So it is entirely her business who she decides to pursue a relationship with.
        The problems with terms like ‘slut’ and ‘bitch’ is they are degrading and hold women to a much higher standard than men. If a man had done the same would you accuse him of being ‘damaged goods’? Are you suggesting that a woman’s only worth is her virtue? That a woman is worthless if she is progressive and doesn’t conform to outdated views on her role in society?
        You have stated you sent your daughter to college to get a good education but would ‘kill her’ if she had a lot of different relationships. Surely your focus should be on her making the most of her educational opportunities and forging a life for herself that is full of joy and rewarding. Be that with one boyfriend or many different ones.

      • siriusthecat

        No no I said I’d kill her for behaving like that. Its a selfish slutty lifestyle, whether its a boy or girl doing it. Its not even just about being promiscuous. Its about having little to no reguard for others feelings. I raised my daughter to respect herself AND others. You don’t need a boyfriend every minute of your life. That is how woman get trapped under a mans thumb. The girls emulating Taylor don’t have the means she has. My daughter was with me when we came across this. She’s the one that posted here initially and all replies came to me. It was meant to be a little more lighthearted. At least we were laughing. Then I have an inbox calling me a man and other lovely things. I’m starting to think my kid punked me bringing me to a man hating lesbo site or something. Wow. Being equal to men, does not mean sinking to their level does it? Most men aren’t even like that. Its another stereotype.

      • Shway

        Who says she has sex with all or even most of them? Pretty ignorant and sexist to say that a girl fucks every guy she dates.

    • anon

      this is most ridiculous, ignorant, and sexist argument i have ever come across. (i honestly don’t even know how i ended up on this page, i should be on godlikeproductions.com). anyways the woman is 23 years old for fuck’s sake! she SHOULD be able to atleast date as much as she wants/need. oh wait i forgot that the republic of sheep i live in is trained from a young age to marry early, stay with one man (that may end up unable to suit her needs) and churn out babies for said man (because that’s is the only “acceptable” way for a woman to act). fuck you guys, seriously. and fuck the father who commented below me, you just have some creepy over-bearing dad complex, as i said she is 23 and when your daughter is 23 i hope she sleeps with as many men (hell or even women) as she wants because its her fucking right as a human being you stupid piece of shit.

      • Soshiloveable

        and get an STD…

      • siriusthecat

        I hope she gets paid for it then. Seeing the quality of her parents she’ll be doing internet porn for free. Assuming anyone is willing to make a baby with you.

      • Chloe

        Just because the media has linked her to these people does not mean she has slept with them or has done anything that can be considered “slutty”. Also I believe you miss the point of the article… It is that slut shaming is repressive and is only done to females not males. You admit you are a mother of an 18 year old well I think you might be a little old to be reading teen gossip and have pretty outdated opinions being presented. Maybe educate yourself on relevant issues and something other than celebrity gossip then attempt an argument. I feel sorry for your daughter if she has such a poor influence for her development into womanhood. But then I almost feel like you are just trolling because seriously what you are saying is absolutely bigoted.

      • siriusthecat

        We were both posting under my account. All the replies came to me after she was gone. Its winter break, we weren’t trolling. I’d say the trolls were the obscene nasty responses. I’m not a perfect parent, but my kid made it to college without pregnancy or drug addiction or a criminal record. We are actually close enough to hang out because we want to. I never had that with my mom.

      • Ally

        If those are the standard you set as a parent then you should consider moving the bar a little higher. Making it to college hardly means anything anymore, everyone has a college degree. Jesus, if I were to say to my parents look I made it to college without becoming pregnant, a drug addict, or a criminal as some sort of accomplishment they would laugh… And you slut shaming Taylor Swift all over this board does not make your daughter seem any more “accomplished”.

      • siriusthecat

        And taking my quote so grossly out of context makes you seem what?

      • Kristin

        First off the siriusthecat, I am totally shocked that you think your daughter is so amazing and respects herself and all the other stuff you keep bragging about on here. By the way you are talking to people on here you sound so damn ignorant! Making fun of people, being immature, and slut shaming. Whether your the mom of dad, whoever decides to comment next, i feel bad for your daughter and I highly doubt that she’s this angel you think she is. You and your wife are bored pathetic people who have nothing better to do than pick on someone who you do not know at all, and argue with everyone else who has an opinion. Here’s some news for you, I’m 20 years old and since the age of 16 I’ve had around 15 boyfriends, and guess what? IM STILL A VIRGIN. Shocking right? That I can have so many boyfriends and still be a virgin. AND that all the relationships ended on good terms, AND that nobody in high school never said anything About it? Yet a old couple on the Internet can’t get over it? I by no means care about Taylor swift, but that doesn’t mean she’s a slut. She’s 23, she can date 100 guys in a month and it shouldn’t bother people. 99 percent if the things you see on magazines and on E! News isn’t true! If she didn’t come out on tv and actually say the things people accuse her of, than nobody has any proof that any of those rumors are true. Maybe her and all her boyfriends break up bc she doesn’t have sex, who knows. That’s right, nobody. She’s had 13 boyfriends, yet not one of them has come out and said anything nasty about her or shown any hate for her, I think that says something. While all these people are on these websites slut shaming her, like yourself siriuSthecat, she’s out there being a multimillionaire, having fun with as many guys as she wants, and not giving two shits about an old married pathetic couple who have their heads up their asses!

      • KB

        you need to learn how to hit “reply” … and also perhaps compose yourself on the internet.

    • Soshiloveable

      a slut is a girl who sleeps with dozens of men..

      • siriusthecat

        What about a girl who will sleep with anyone they can get? They may not hit a dozen ever. Still slutty. A slut is a girl with loose morals. She might blow everyone and be a virgin, still a slut. Sleeps with married men on purpose = slut. More than one maybe two men in one month(this one is Taylor) Slut.

    • http://ninnelson.com/ gigi5

      Great definitions of “slut” here! Keep going, the urban dictionary needs us!

    • LMAO

      Do any of you know what sexism even is? How ironic the only sexism displayed are the ones attacking and accusing what they perceived to be a man. That seems to be the point of the article. Miley is perceived to be a slut yet she behaves like lady. Taylor is perceived as a lady yet behaves like a slut. I’m pretty sure the reason is how they dress and talk. Looks can be deceiving.

      • Zazzina

        I agree, people see misunderstand and slander. Freshmen year of high school I didn’t have a job so I had to wear a lot of misfitting handmedowns so people called me a stoner, three years later those same people call me snobbish and preppy because I dress in slacks dress shirts and nice jackets for my job.
        I don’t think Taylor is a slut, because I am 17 and have personally dated 5 men in the past couple years but I am still a virgin by anyone’s standards. I agree with the author that her songs are exploitive and rude, but as for her relationships they are her own, which knows she might have left those guys because they wanted her to be a slut.

    • Marxism

      I hate to be this guy but the people defending her come off as a tad slutty to be honest.. Ok you can date in twenties but 13 in 3 years.. thats about 4 a year.. so one every 3 months? which is basically going with the seasons.. Its true what others have said if she was all glitz and glamoured like paris or kim.. people will be jumping to the gun calling her a slut.. but cos she pulls the innocent act everyone loves it.. She should have self-respect, fair play if shes not actually dated all 13 and maybe had a couple dates but who knows

      • siriusthecat

        Omg you sexist evil man, but guys can do it right.. just kidding. I was roasted and accused of being a creepy dad for that opinion. Turns out I’m a bad mother because my 18 year old daughter is just a college student. Not to mention I will never encourage her to sleep with as many people as she can. I never once said it would be OK for a boy. To me its about having respect for yourself and others.

    • Crestina Styles

      TAYLOR SWIFT IS A SLUT SHE IS GOING FROM GUY TO GUY SOMEDAY SHE IS JUST GONNA GET RAPED AND I AM GONNA LAUGH!!!! HARRY IS MINE

    • dfc

      Don’t see the point of this post.
      Anyway, Taylor Swift is a slut.

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