• Tue, Dec 11 2012

Is Charlie Sheen Giving Away All His Money Because He Thinks He’s Going To Die Soon?

I’m starting to get a little bit worried about Charlie Sheen, you guys.

First, he donated $100,000 to Lindsay Lohan‘s tax bill like it wasn’t no thing, and I was like, “hmm, maybe he wants to bang her.” But now he has donated another $75,000 to someone he hopefully does not want to bang, namely a 10-year-old girl with cancer, so I’m starting to think there could be something else at play here. Did Charlie Sheen have a near death experience or something?

According to Gossip Cop, Sheen was recently “chatting with a Hermosa Beach police officer” (presumably not from the back of a cop car) and “learned about a cop whose 10-year-old daughter Jasmine had been diagnosed with Childhood Rhabdomyosarcoma, a type of cancer that affects the muscle tissue.” The next day, he donated $75,000 to a fund the officers had started for Jasmine.

Does this sound like Charlie Sheen to you? Forgive my cynicism, but whenever a hedonistic celebrity looks up from his hookers and blow for a minute to do something nice for someone else, I have to wonder if he is 1.) dying, 2.) just trying to improve his image, or 3.) still reeling from the effects of a visit from the Ghost of Christmas past. I think it’s been well established that Charlie Sheen cannot be killed with even a briefcase of cocaine, and he has little sense of when he’s coming off like a douche, so I’m going to go with 3.) Charlie Sheen was visited by a ghost who changed his perspective on life.

Or maybe he even went through a full Ebenezer Scrooge and was visited by not one, not two, not three, but four ghosts, starting with that of his recently deceased friend/assistant Rick Calamaro. I can see it now:

How now!” said Sheen, caustic and cold as ever. “What do you want with me?”

“Much!” — Calamaro’s voice, no doubt about it.

“Who are you?”

“Ask me who I was.

“Who were you then?”  said Sheen, raising his voice.  “You’re particular, for a shade.” He was going to say “to a shade,” but substituted this, as more appropriate.

“In life I was your partner, Rick Calamaro.”

“Can you — can you sit down?”  asked Scrooge, looking doubtfully at him.

“I can.”

“Do it then.”

And so on. The ghosts showed him visions of Christmas past, present and future (wherein a grey-pubed Sheen finds himself all alone on Christmas after running out of money for prostitutes), and Charlie Sheen’s heart grew three sizes that day.

Now if you will excuse me, I need to find Mr. Sheen and convince him to pay my tax bill before he gets too picky about who and what he donates to. Winning!

(Via GossipCop)

Photo: WENN

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  • lulu

    Well you try to be funny..at least you tried..but knows one thing : Charlie Sheen gave money to people who need it (and i don’t talk about hookers and dealers..ha !) more than once but usually these actions doesn’t interest press..maybe this time his PR did something for them and they decide to talk about some other side of Charlie Sheen who actually exists since a long time..