• Mon, Dec 10 2012

Amanda Seyfried May Be Playing A Pornstar, But I’m Choosing To Believe She’s Never Watched Porn

If you’re a male human being, you’re probably aware that Amanda Seyfried is set to star in the upcoming Lovelace, set to be released in 2013. The reason you males are probably aware of this is that Amanda will be playing porn star Linda Lovelace. That’s right, everybody, you heard me — Amanda Seyfried: PORN STAR. Aka we all about to see some Seyfried boobies, because I can’t imagine a situation in which Amanda won’t be naked at some point in this movie. Which, frankly, I don’t know how I feel about. I like Amanda a lot, but I’m not sure I think of her in that nakey way. I thought we were just friends; she’s my goody-two-shoes roommate who has her life together and always lets me borrow her white button-down for interviews and knows how to treat the couch when I spill red wine on it. She’s not some porn floozy, and I’m not totally comfortable with seeing her naked, okay?!?

Of course, this is not a problem that most, dare I say any guys will have. She’s hot, she’s blond, she’s gonna be naked. Why mess with success? As far as they’re concerned, this is payback in advance for you dragging them to see Les Miserables at midnight on Christmas when all they really want to do is stay home and play with their new iPad. Sidenote: you’re so sweet for getting him and iPad. Good for you. How original. But anyway. Yes. This is happening. And as a female human being, I don’t know how I feel about it. Particularly the part where Amanda says that in order to prepare for the role, that she watched Linda Lovelace’s films, most notably Deep Throat, the 1972 adult film that made her famous. Mehhhhh. Noooooo. This makes total sense to me on the level of Amanda studying up on the person she’s supposed to portray, but my brain doesn’t want to imagine her watching porn. She’s better than that! She has her life together! She owns an ironing board! The only way I can possibly get my head around this is by imagining her watching these movies in a screening room with hipster glasses and a clipboard, taking meticulous notes. Otherwise my brain will explode in confusion and sadness. Because if Amanda Seyfried watches porn, then I don’t know what to believe anymore in this cruel cruel world.

(Image: Lia Toby / WENN.com)

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