It wasn’t until my freshman year of college that I learned the golden holiday rule: No Christmas music until after Thanksgiving. Here I was blasting Jingle Bells in the middle of September. What a fool I was.
As soon as Halloween is over Christmas throws up all over stores across the country, completely leaving Thanksgiving out of the holiday season. Music blasts over the speakers reminding you that in just two short months Christmas will be here.
While I tell my friends I’m disgusted (“Ugh! It’s not even DECEMBER!) inside I’m actually ecstatic. For the precious minutes I’m in the store I get to unintentionally cheat and listen to the music I’m deprived of for more than 10 months out of the year. Scandalous, I know.
Guess what, ladies and gentlemen? Now that Thanksgiving is over you’re free to listen to all the holiday music you want! No shame! In the days leading up to this momentous occasion I’ve curated a playlist filled with what I consider the best of the best of holiday music. And of course, the best of the worst.
In an effort to spread the cheer like Buddy from Elf in a slightly different way, I thought I’d share with Crushable readers a list of some holiday favorites and I’ve analyzed what they suggest about their respective fans. What does your favorite say about you? Read on to find out.
Baby It’s Cold Outside
You’re using the holidays and the weather as an excuse to get laid. Obviously you’re a risk taker, but also a smooth talker. This just might work.
You’re a festive soul looking to take shots of peppermint schnapps and slur some bad Spanish until you eventually find a random stranger to kiss under the mistletoe.
The Chanukah Song
If this Adam Sandler tune is your favorite, then you’re the only kid in town without a Christmas tree. Not Jewish? Then you just appreciate an awesome song. Go you!
AlI Want For Christmas
You’re 15-years-old or in college dating your soulmate of the week. Exception: If you’re listening to the Michael Bublé version. Then you’re one classy lady who is in a committed relationship.
That Mariah Carey song was probably your favorite last year. Unfortunately, things didn’t work out so well. (This stands whether or not your preferred version is by Glee or Wham!)
Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
You really don’t like your relatives or you’ve got a sick sense of humor. Either way I’ve decided we should be best friends.
Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays
You’re a ’90s baby, no doubt, and you appreciate a good sing-a-long. You’ll definitely be blasting this in the car with your friends on the way to an annual holiday party.
Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas
Christmas is a beautiful occasion in your house, and not filled with crazy drunk cousins or anything like that. You and your family sit around the fire in cozy sweaters, look at each other as if you’ve just met for the first time, and hold hands. Very aww-worthy.
Let It Snow
You’re looking to snuggle. Hard…
The Chipmunk Song
You’re wacky, and maybe even a little drunk. Channeling your inner 5-year-old isn’t only for the holidays in your book!
You’re A Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Much like “Grandma Got Run Over…”you probably like this because you’ve got a secret dark side. Hopefully one that’s playful though, not mean spirited. Nobody wants coal in their stocking.
The Christmas Shoes
Why would this SAD, SAD song be your favorite? You’re definitely an extremely emotional person in need of a good cry.
But seriously a song about a little boy whose mother is dying during the holidays is the most depressing song ever. How can I get this banned from radio stations?
A Lonely Jew On Christmas
You’re hilarious and all your friends love you. You’re also really appreciative of the fact that you don’t have to sit on pervy Santa’s lap at the mall like the rest of your friends.
Regardless of the version, I don’t think you need me to tell you who you are…
O Holy Night
You think Christmas is a time to celebrate the birth of sweet, sweet baby Jesus. It ain’t all about giving presents.
Did your favorite make the list?