• Thu, Nov 22 2012

The Ultimate Thanksgiving TV Guide To Prevent You From Killing Your Family

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Thanksgiving — a day to be (extra) thankful for the delicious food on your plate and your loving friends and family. If we’re being honest here (and I hope we are) it’s also a time when those same friends and family have the potential to drive you absolutely crazy. To keep you from carving away at something (or someone) other than the bird on your table, we’ve put together the ultimate Thanksgiving TV guide. It comes complete with movies, TV shows and holiday specials. Everything you need to know when you’re wrestling the remote away from your elderly great-aunt.

Specials:

 

The annual Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade (CBS, NBC 9 AM) is the perfect way to start your day.  I’m certain there is no better time waster and I hear some of our favorite Olympic gold medalists will be making an appearance. As usual the parade will be followed by the annual National Dog Show (ABC, 12 p.m.) Even better, if you miss the parade because you were normal and slept in, it’s on again at 2!

Other specials everyone can appreciate:

A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving and This Is America, Charlie Brown (ABC, 8 p.m) and Michael Jackson: Bad 25 (ABC, 9 30 p.m.)

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Marathons:

 

 

There will be two exceptional marathons playing this Thanksgiving. First, R. Kelly‘s award-winning Trapped In The Closet series (what? It’s not award winning? oops!) This will surely keep you entertained all day (IFC,10 a.m.)  Maybe it will even remind you of how normal your family is.

Obviously the more important marathon of the day is  Breaking Amish (TLC, 11 a.m.) Spend all day reliving Katie’s crazy antics or listening to Jeremiah consistently prove what a misogynistic ass he can be. As you watch, be thankful for the little things you take for granted every day like electricity, normal clothes, and scripted reality television.

Movies:

 

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The best movies are always playing on Thanksgiving and this year doesn’t disappoint. First up: Willy Wonka and The Chocolate Factory (ABC Family, 12 p.m). Yes, the 1971 original with Gene Wilder! Christmas on Thanksgiving, folks. These three other classics are also playing that day:

Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure  (Comedy Central, 3 p.m.)
Jumanji (ION, 5 p.m.)
The Blindside (ABC Family, 5 p.m.)

 

Now Go ahead and enjoy a nice, turkey-filled food Break

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Annndddddd Just in case you also need a small break from all this Thanksgiving-ness, The X Factor will be playing at it’s regular time ( Fox, 8 p.m.) Now back to the good stuff…

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  • gina

    I have to let you know that this breakdown on what was on this weekend saved my life! My house was filled with relatives, friends and DISH coworkers this weekend for our Thanksgiving feast, so it was nice to get a break and just watch some TV afterwards. I wouldn’t have known that a ton of these shows were on this weekend if it wasn’t for this list! It’s just lucky that my DISH Hopper DVR can record up to six things at once, so I didn’t have to pick and choose which marathon, movie, or holiday special I’d be able to watch. It might be a little early to request this, but please do another list like this for Christmas! ;)

    • Elisa

      So glad I could help! I’ll see what I can do for Christmas!