Amy Poehler’s Son Wants To Know What Happened To Amy Poehler’s Penis, Fair Question

Last night on The Late Show with David Letterman, Amy Poehler shared an incredibly precious story about her son Archie Arnett. You know her son Archie, right? We stalked him last week and bestowed him with the title “Underrated Celebrity Child.”  Anyway, it sounds like there’s a lot more to him than classic nursery school adorableness. In fact, the story Amy Poehler tells about him makes him sound like quite the inquisitive child.

While I could tell the story in charming detail, this wonderful tumblr made it in the most wonderful little GIF vignette:

 

 

 

There are so many wonderfully valid reasons that I’m jealous of children. But the biggest reason is that I miss the days when I didn’t have to censor myself. The days when people found my provocative statements adorable — and not grounds for a class-action lawsuit. Everyone loved all my questions and everyone answered them slowly and politely. Even when I asked them 9 times in a row and didn’t listen the first 8 times. Now everyone’s all like, “I already told you 4000 times that we won’t seat you until your entire party arrives at the restaurant.”

Aahh, what I’d give to be four again and be allowed to ask questions. Also what I’d give to have Amy Poehler adopt me as an adult and tell anecdotes about me on TV.

(Photo: PacificCoastNews.com/GIFS: daenerysknope.tumblr.com)

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    • AlbinoWino

      After my parents told me about the birds and bees, I kept asking them bizarre questions about sex because I just couldn’t seem to wrap my head around it. One day in the car I asked my mother how long sex took. Without skipping a beat or seeming too weirded out she responded, “20 minutes”.