When last we checked in with Jon Hamm‘s penis, it was enjoying a leisurely day of shopping with its owner, Jon Hamm, and Hamm’s girlfriend, Jennifer Westfeldt. Since then, its fame has grown exponentially, making numerous public appearances and waving to fans, despite Hamm’s best efforts to contain it. Now, Jon Hamm’s penis is trying its hand at politics, stumping for Barack Obama in the crucial swing state of Colorado.
Perched on top of the Obama bus, Jon Hamm’s penis outlined its belief in reproductive rights, affordable healthcare, and marriage equality, especially stressing the need for abortion rights in light of the fact that it’s possible to get pregnant just from looking at it. “A vote for Obama is a vote for Jon Hamm’s penis!” it said, to much uproarious cheering and applause.
Not one to be outdone by his own member, Jon Hamm is helping to get out the vote as well, delivering the following (actually real) anecdote to potential voters:
“I had a 13 year old girl come up to me in Colorado -this is a dead true story- and say, “Well, you’re a wealthy white male… why are you here?” And I was like, first of all, that’s the greatest question I’ve been asked on this entire tour. But secondly, she had conflated somehow in her head that only people vote for their own kind. And I made sure to tell her that that’s absolutely not the case. I vote for what I think is best for all of us. Not simply for me. And that’s unfortunately the message that the other side wants to get across, is you just take care of yourself and you build a fence around yourself and no one else gets help. That’s not how I was raised, that’s not the America I wanna live in and that’s not the America that I believe in.”