Remember when Lindsay Lohan rear-ended an 18-wheeler not even six months ago? Well, it turns out that LiLo made the mistake of lying to the cops about the accident, claiming that she wasn’t driving her rented Porsche. Several witnesses disagreed, and the cops determined that they believed these upstanding folks rather than the starlet who can’t keep her act together for more than a few months.
Even worse for Linds is that lying to an officer is considered a misdemeanor (obstruction of justice), and a violation of her probation. Even though her supervised probation ended this past March, she’s still on informal probation until May 2014. All she had to do was follow the law, but that has proven to be far too difficult. According to TMZ, if this goes to court, Lindsay will be face-to-face with the same judge who presided over her jewelry theft case, and we wouldn’t be surprised if she got more jail time.
Of course, Lindsay being Lindsay, she’ll spend a laughably short time in the slammer before being released because of some bullshit excuse about overcrowding and getting rid of non-violent offenders. We decided to do some quick math to approximate just how long Lindsay would have spent in jail had she served out her full sentences for each offense since 2007… and the results are downright scary.
Huge thanks to Examiner, who compiled a detailed list of Lindsay’s crimes from the past five years! Here’s the breakdown, as we see it:
• August 2007: Sentenced to 1 day in jail for misdemeanor cocaine use and DUI. Goes in on November 15th but serves only 84 minutes. So we’re gonna round that up as -1 day
• July 2010: LiLo violated probation and is sentenced to 90 days of jail. Released after only 14 days, which means -76 days
• September 2010: Another probation violation gets her 30 days in jail. She serves part of 1 day before being released on bail and entering the Betty Ford Clinic for three months. We’ll be nice and round up: -29 days
• February 2011: Stealing that necklace gets LiLo 120 days in jail, but due to overcrowding yet again she serves 35 days of house arrest. -85 days
• October 2011: Failing a random alcohol test gets her a day in jail: +1 day
• November 2011: During the probation hearing, Lindsay is sentenced to 30 days in jail, but yet again breezes out within a few hours. -29 days
Until now, Lindsay had mostly stayed out of trouble in 2012. At least, her trouble was confined to passing out in hotels and hitting cars and/or pedestrians. We didn’t include her rehab time because for the most part she served out those sentences. So, let’s call this… 219 days, or almost 7 months. And that’s not including what she gets sentenced for her latest misdemeanor! Wow.