Ellen Speaks To Undecided Voters On Her Show, Asks Them What’s Wrong With Them

Thank you Ellen DeGeneres for addressing the mind boggling conundrum that are undecided voters. It’s November 2nd and the presidential election’s a few days away. How do you not know now if you’re voting for President Barack Obama or Mitt Romney.

It’d be the equivalent of telling someone you can’t decide whether you want to watch Rock Center or Jersey Shore on Thursday night. They’re completely different shows. There’s no way you don’t have an opinion. Unless of course you don’t know anything about either one and simply just recognize the  names. In that case you don’t deserve to own a TV. Or have an internet connection. Be off with you!

Ellen clearly agrees with me (and unlike most days, we didn’t even consult on this matter beforehand) because she delivers a more serious monologue than usual on her show today. Sure it’s still funny, but it’s laced with a little bit of anger toward these undecided voters, these 5% of Americans who just can’t make up their mind.

You know, these Americans:

While she doesn’t come right out and say “VOTE OBAMA!” she says enough that you know exactly who she’s endorsing. You know, the guy who cares about marriage equality and all that liberal jazz that gets us all excited here at Crushable.

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    • Misty

      I wish Ellen would keep politics out of her show. I really enjoy watching her but I can’t stand to see celebrities try to force their opinion on me…what makes them any more knowledgeable than my next door neighbor. I do know who I will vote for and I took alot of things into consideration before making my decision. Just because Obama is for gay marriage does not make him capable of running our country. Please Ellen..don’t push politics on us!

      • Jenni

        I think her overall gist wasn’t about voting Obama, but just getting out there and voting in general.

      • lschelin

        I don’t think celebrities force their opinions on anyone. They certainly have the right to state who they support, Faux NoNews does it daily

    • Jem

      Why on earth should Ellen vote for someone who doesn’t think she should have the right to get married or have the right to make decisions about her body? Of course she has a right to have an opinion and it’s her show. She can state it if she wants. Frankly if she voted for the other guy I would be concerned that she had a lot of self hate going on,

    • http://twitter.com/AgendaWakeUp Ms Jordan

      GO and VOTE!

      Now… UNINSTALLING TEAPARTY CONTROL….. █████████████▒ 94% complete.

    • Trish

      Any time I see someone complain about someone talking politics it’s because they just heard something about their party that they don’t like, or they just don’t care about politics, in which case they should just keep their mouth shut and continue not caring. She wasn’t forcing an opinion on anyone. As American citizens we SHOULD be concerned about not only the issues, but also our fellow citizens. It’s a high probability that what she said on her show helped someone make up their mind! She didn’t endorse anyone, but if you don’t already know who she’s voting for, you’re not too bright. Not because she’s homosexual, but because she’s an intelligent woman.

    • Into The Void

      Maybe because they both heinously sucked, genius. Now we’re stuck with the worst of the 2 for 4 more intolerable years.