Madonna Falls On Stage, Sues Manufacturer Who Made Her Legs

Because nip slips are getting passé at this point and she ran out of guns, Madonna tripped and fell while performing in Dallas, Texas on October 20th. One second she’s dancing, the next second she’s rolling around on the stage. While it’s not funny that she fell, it’s not not funny. You know?

And because she’s Madonna and because she’s the human embodiment of the Energizer Bunny, she didn’t stop singing (singing being a euphemism for mouthing to the music) as she fell. In fact she picked herself up so flawlessly that I couldn’t help but pray to God that I would be that limber at her age. That I could fall on my back in the middle of a performance and pop right back up like I meant to do that.

As much as I want to say that she’s performing past her prime, I just can’t do it anymore. Her MDMA tour continues to get headlines for various reasons and if Miley Cyrus has taught us anything, it’s that no publicity’s bad publicity.

So you know what Madonna, you keep going. You keep performing and you keep doing crazy things like falling and waving guns and calling President Obama a black Muslim, and we’ll keep watching you. You’ve mastered the media cycle and there’s no turning back now.

Congratulations, you’re officially a celebrity of our generation.

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    • Petranella

      It was more like a roll than a “splat” fall lol.

      • Jenni

        It was a slow motion fall, which makes sense at her age.

      • Petranella

        I think vomiting onstage has got to be a lot more embarrassing!

      • Jenni

        That’s so cliche by now, Bieber and Gaga did it. Madonna has to stay fresh and new